Posted by BabyToes on June 11, 2009, at 1:34:47
I feel I am no longer welcomed here. I thought I would try to come back, maybe try again, but I guess some of my mistakes will never be forgiven. I get that. All I know is that there are a lot of untruths and rumors about me and I have no way to prove it to anyone. I have not done the horrible things I am being accused of. People will believe what they want and I have no control about that. But I do have control over what I do and feel about myself.
I have changed a lot and have grown, PTSD is a bitch to live with. Most here don't understand the triggers and behaviors of people with PTSD, and while some other disorders are more acceptable here, PTSD isn't understood very much. "I" am not understood here much.
Some of my behaviors have not been good on here, mainly when I was triggered because of my PTSD and was angry, but I am still a good person. I am trying with therapy to become a better person but I am a sensitive person, and while it might feel good to try to hurt me, get me blocked, I can see past that and see it isn't really about myself. I feel sorry for those who try to be hurt me, but I have overcome many things in my life, and those behaviors won't effect me anymore. Keeping all that rage and unforgiveness inside will only hurt yourself, for it doesn't even touch me anymore. I have moved on to a better place,a place I hope you all can experience one day. I am a survivor.
I don't hate any babblers and I don't wish anyone bad will, I hope you all can find peace in your hearts and maybe someday forgive me if I have hurt you or anyone.
We all have issues and this place should be a place where we come to be understood and accepted, but I overstayed my welcome and I get that. I believe the blocking issues and rules on this site are too punitive, especially for a mental health site. I can't support a place that doesn't support me or can ever forgive.
Note to Dr. BOb, maybe in junction with trying to get others to say they are sorry, maybe you should also work on those Babblers who can't forgive. It goes both ways.Happyflower
poster:BabyToes
thread:900430
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090529/msgs/900430.html