Posted by alexandra_k on June 30, 2009, at 23:06:46
In reply to Re: block avoidance, posted by Dr. Bob on June 30, 2009, at 10:07:10
> What I'm trying to shift is power. Or, to be more precise, self-efficacy, since we already share power.HAHAHAHAHA all the times posters have blocked you according to site guidelines. What power do they have???
> As I said before, I wonder if some posters may be attached (not by choice, of course) to feelings of powerlessness.
Well, in the spirit of meeting us half-way and all, I wonder if one particular poster may be attached (not by choice, of course) to retaining control.
If a little bit of both could result in a particularly unhelpful dynamic.
You seem very keen to persuade (us? yourself?) that you don't actually have the control that you actually do have. Very keen to persuade (us? yourself?) that we have more control than we actually do have.
> But empathy, communication, reassurance, and checking in give you influence (a form of power).
You lost me.
> But the flip side of power is responsibility.
Like the responsibility you take for the rules you have, the way you interpret posts meeting or failing to meet your rules, and the block lengths you set, and choose either to or not to enforce? That kind of power and responsibility?
> Be the change you wish to see. Show other posters how they might interpret things more charitably. Encourage them to apologize. Suggest they not address those they can't get along with. In those and other ways, use your influence to help them avoid long, escalating blocks.
Why don't you be the change you profess to wish to see? Change your blocking system. If you really hate to block people and hate to see them blocked and are sorry that you block them then... Why not just stoppit?????
poster:alexandra_k
thread:900430
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090529/msgs/904112.html