Posted by TamaraJ on February 20, 2005, at 22:13:44
In reply to Re: how to cope and accept? » TamaraJ, posted by rainbowbrite on February 20, 2005, at 20:53:09
> I just feel so confused. And your right I don't want to erase the people, just the pain. I hate death so much! Im sure everyone does. To not fear the loss of someone means in a way that you have to always say nice things and never leave someone angry, thats really hard. Often I say things I don't really mean out of frustration and anger and recently I have been stressing about doing that.
-- Maybe it's just me, but I don't think it means that we should (or even can) walk around on eggshells trying to avoid never getting mad at the people we love. We are human after all, and anger and frustration are normal emotions in my mind. People are going to tick us off once in a while, no matter how much we love them, and we will say things that we regret. I have said (and say) things in anger that I regret. Perhaps what it comes down to is about being able to reflect on our relationships and know we always did our best to be loving, kind and respectful, and that the people in our lives know they are loved. And, we also need to be able to forgive ourselves for things said and done in the heat of the moment. You know, instead of dwelling on the negative moments in the relationship, focus on the positive aspects of the relationship. I don't know. Maybe that doesn't make any sense at all.
I think death is really getting to me. I hope this is a normal reaction. I feel like Im going through something that 5 year olds experience.
-- I think it is a normal reaction. We all go through the questioning phase. For me, I think it is a natural and necessary part of the life cycle (as difficult as it may be).
> Thank you for being there for me
-- Any time :-) Take care of you.
Tamara
poster:TamaraJ
thread:460475
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20041230/msgs/461075.html