Posted by tina on June 29, 2001, at 9:19:49
In reply to Depressed Niece wants no meds...., posted by Shar on June 28, 2001, at 22:33:55
it's so sad but unfortunately I don't think anything you do will help. She will come to the decision to help herself eventually but trying to convince her now is just hurting you. Watch her, listen to her, be there for her. That's all any of us can do.
It is frustrating, I know.
thinking about you
Tina> .....and her aunt needs help.
>
> I spoke with my niece today who is in her mid-twenties and very depressed, lots of hopelessness. I realized in talking with her that I am sort of at a loss to offer guidance to someone who doesn't want meds. She has taken meds before and thinks they will either cause brain damage, or she'll be an addict. She has had limited success with meds and I'm not sure of her compliance level when taking them.
>
> I couldn't think of much to suggest aside from counseling/CBT. She is unemployed, she says the only free counseling help or med help is for people who are hurting themselves. She said she can't get in (hospital or counseling) unless she is about to commit suicide so they won't help her.
>
> I suggested some things, and got a blanket "that won't work because" response. I know how bad it sucks to be depressed, and yet I feel frustrated dealing with her. I know part of her no-win attitude may be the depression itself. I don't think it is truly accurate that the only help available is for suicidal people, because I've worked in the non-profit community here and know of other resources that I told her about. She has been through this type of experience before, quitting her meds cold turkey, then being 'unable' to find any help.
>
> She doesn't have regular internet access for internet help.
>
> I invited her to come to my house and she said she couldn't, plus neither her mother (who lives across the street from me) nor I could really do anything to help her.
>
> Arrrggghhh. Any suggestions that do not include my working her program? I believe she needs to take steps to help herself, and I will cheerlead but I won't take her steps or make her decisions for her.
>
> Suggestions will be most appreciated.
> Shar
poster:tina
thread:6896
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010628/msgs/6909.html