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Re: Do you know where your T....? » JayMac

Posted by DAisym on October 3, 2008, at 19:15:45

In reply to Re: Do you know where your T....?, posted by JayMac on October 3, 2008, at 12:59:47

I think these intense feelings ebb and flow in therapy, based on what is happing in your own life and what you are working on in therapy. I absolutely agree with Lucie - be nice to yourself and use distractions to help you through the tough times.

I used to think of it as merging, almost, with my therapist. So when I left, I had to tear myself away and it felt so alone and so cold. I felt this terrifying sensation of coming apart - fragmenting - and he seemed to be the only one who could hold me together. We worked on this a lot - and I think you telling your therapist all that you did today is one of those hugely important steps to getting a handle on your attachment.

It takes time, but eventually you will be able to (mostly) hold on to her in-between sessions. Until then, write to her like you were talking to her or find a concrete way to "hold" her. I have my therapist's talisman and a couple of other little things he has given me over the years. They help. He also leaves me voicemails when I'm having a hard time feeling him with me. Once we did this whole exercise in visioning - I wanted to be able to imagine where he was when he wasn't in his office. So he described his home office so I could really "see" him. It helps but it also tells me these things are OK and he understands how I'm feeling.

I hope you have a good weekend.

 

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poster:DAisym thread:855293
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