Posted by jeff g on December 8, 2003, at 23:53:10
In reply to What do I do now? (rhetorical), posted by EmilyUK on November 25, 2003, at 5:51:25
hey I am really sorry to hear about your breakup. A few months ago my girlfriend of 2 years and I broke up, we had been living together and were madly in love, and it was a great relationship. It was a horrible breakup for me, we were each others first really strong love. It is the worst thing I've ever gone through.. I felt suicidal myself.. not really that I wanted to die, but I just couldn't bear the level of hurt and regret I was feeling. I cried my eyes out every day for weeks, lost about 25 pounds from not eating, hardly could sleep (eventually had to get sleeping pills to get some). Basically I was a total wreck for the first month, now after about 2.5 months I am doing better, but it still hurts like hell. I am still in love with her, but she started a new relationship only 2 weeks after making love to me and telling me she is so glad we are together.
Someone said in reply that no matter how hard you love someone you can't make them love you, you can't change how they feel. This is really sinking in for me now.. I feel like I love and appreciate her more than ever, but I have no chance to win her back because of her new guy. Every day I think about her and the amazing experiences, and how much potential we had together, and I wish so hard that I could get any chance to bring us back together, but each day I still don't hear from her.
I don't know what insight to offer you but that there are others going through the same kind of deal. Its really horrible and I am having issues coping myself. I would agree with keeping busy though, I started taking martial arts, and I am taking some classes at the local college. Just things to get me healthier and putting other things in my mind to dwell on besides my lost love. Exercise has helped me a lot too, when I get really down or feel like I am about to get really upset, I will go right out and play basketball to exhaustion. I notice that it releases a great deal of pent up energy and frustration, and makes me feel more at peace. Not sure what to advise besides that, but if he drinks as badly as you say, he is probably not ready to be in a great loving relationship anyways. If you want to talk more let me know. Best of luck.
poster:jeff g
thread:283517
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/287892.html