Posted by Joslynn on October 22, 2004, at 9:24:19
In reply to 12 step programs, posted by Cass on September 27, 2004, at 17:40:24
Hi Cass. I go to 12-step groups and they have helped me immensely, though I still have a long way to go.
I go to ACoA meetings because my father is alcoholic. However, in the ACoA meeting I go to, we start out by saying it's for ACoAs and anyone else from a dysfunctional family. I also catch an AlAnon meetings sometimes. It's for the families and friends of alcoholics,, anyone who has been affected by alcoholism in a friend or family members, and that's the only requirement. A person doesn't have to view themselves as a victim or not as a victim. It doesn't get that abstract. As the spouse of an alcoholic, you definitely qualify to go.
Sometimes I will also go to CODA. In the preamble to that meeting, it simply says it's for anyone desiring healthy relationships. The partner of an addict is only one version of someone with codependency, by the way. An author once said that a codependent doesn't need another person to be codependent, they can be codependent with a lamp post!
But really, the best way for you to determine whether or not the meetings are for you is to attend at least six meetings. Then you can decide. I can share my experiences, you can do research, find things on the internet, etc., but the best way to decide is to go to the meetings.
Regarding AA, my father did eventually join and has been sober for almost 20 years.
poster:Joslynn
thread:395948
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faith/20040914/msgs/405822.html