Posted by seldomseen on December 21, 2008, at 14:59:33
In reply to well said...where is the love? (nm) » twinleaf, posted by fayeroe on December 21, 2008, at 14:00:24
That's a really really good question. Where is the love?
A little history here perhaps... I grew up in a house where how someone felt gave them license to do whatever they wanted. My father felt angry, he took it out on us. My mother felt agitated, she took it out on everyone around her. Same with my brother.
Is that how you love someone?
All they had to do was simply say, "i had a bad day at work" or even "i don't feel well". Instead, in my house, there was no standard of behaviour, no evidence of emotion regulation or control. It was mayhem.
While I certainly do not think that any one should (or can for that matter) have to control the way they feel, I do think people can control what they say and what they do.
Babble is not therapy where there is some trained therapist sitting there with the skill to deflect.
In fact, most of us are pretty raw pretty much of the time.
There is a lot of love to be had in receiving the understanding and support of others, but I also think there is also a lot of love in expressing ourselves thoughtfully and with reverance to others.
Isn't there a lot to be said for that kind of love as well?
Isn't there room for both here?
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:869999
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20081003/msgs/870100.html