Posted by alesta on February 24, 2007, at 23:05:22
once again. I can't count how many times I have fallen into depression throughout my life...perhaps 50, perhaps 100...all I know is it's a damn *lot*. and it happens over and over....
someone told me the other day that they'd never been depressed, not once. I almost didn't believe it. Depression just seems so...ordinary...to me.
the past few weeks have been really rough. i took a quiz concerning depression tonight (already knew i was depressed, but somehow needed to hear it as validation of my pain). the test results said:
"Results and recommendations
Your screening results indicate a high likelihood that you are suffering from severe depression. Your answers also show you might be at risk for harming yourself. You are advised to see your doctor or a mental health professional immediately for a complete evaluation - or dial "911" - or call
1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255). - or go immediately to the nearest hospital Emergency Room for an evaluation. This screening is not a substitute for a complete clinical evaluation.
The good news is clinical depression is a very treatable illness. Almost everyone who receives appropriate treatment can soon feel better. The depression-screening.org web site is NOT designed to respond to suicide crisis. If you believe you are at risk for suicide, dial "911"
or go immediately to the nearest hospital Emergency Room for an evaluation or call 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255). Click here to locate a local healthcare professional that offers
one-on-one depression screening as part of the Screening for Mental Health's screening site locator service."It's funny when you read that and see that they *know* you're probably thinking about suicide. i don't know why that struck me..but it validated that i have a reason to feel that way. and that it will pass.
no one around me has a clue the misery that i feel. i had a couple of really good days in there but then the depression zoomed right back in on me. I have been playing the song "a pain that i'm used to" on youtube...the song somehow expresses the horrible nightmare feeling. here's a link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAACWxaa5sk
even if no one replies....at least someone knows.
(and maybe i'll be better tomorrow.)
i keep coming back here...i guess because i know...somewhere..out there...are people that know me. and perhaps even like me? all right...my self-esteem needs *serious* reparations here...in time...thank you...for listening (unless, of course, you're getting pleasure out of my suffering..naughty, naughty!... :) yeah, she's still got jokes, folks...sort of...<fades away>)
alesta
poster:alesta
thread:735906
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20070223/msgs/735906.html