Posted by fallsfall on March 10, 2004, at 10:07:35
In reply to Re: Just remember to take care of yourself » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on March 10, 2004, at 9:45:56
I wonder how common this problem is... There was a woman in one of my therapy groups who was trying to address her hoarding problem - her house sounded like it looked a lot like your parents'. My parents have a pretty big house, but given time, my dad will get there, too.
It is pretty scary from a health standpoint to see the "conditions" some people live in. You have to let them live their own lives and make their own decisions, but at some point...
I'll ask my sister if she has any good ideas for you.
Take a couple of deep breaths, Dinah. And keep reminding them of your boundaries (You can go over to see your dad, but only once a day. You can arrange for others to help.) Can your mother figure out what to do with the clutter? She is the one who will be effected by it. Will she feel well enough to think about it while she is in the hospital? Remind her that she won't be able to get to her bed. Which parent (or, heaven forbid, is it both?) is the hoarder?
Schedule (and limit) "parents" time in your day - when you go to see your dad, and when you will "worry" about them, and make phonecalls and run errands etc. Bury it during the rest of your day. I don't know, would that work?
With compassion,
Falls
poster:fallsfall
thread:322154
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040305/msgs/322871.html