Posted by Dinah on March 23, 2003, at 20:45:32
In reply to Hospitals make suicidality worse?, posted by OddipusRex on March 23, 2003, at 20:20:33
Oddipus, you have not been obnoxious. And I can't believe you've led an ugly sinful useless life. You seem quite beautiful to me. I admire your concern for others and your exquisite moral sensibilities. You've made a difference right here. You've made me cry with relief at not being alone in how I feel. Really.
I hate to sound trite, but it's the illness speaking. Plus, all the same things that make you so wonderfully you, your moral sensitivity, your concern for others, make life damn hard.
I can only say how I feel about the suicide thing. I promised to my therapist that I would call him first, and it's another "to do". One that might keep me from acting on impulses. And sometimes while I want to kill myself with every fiber of my being, I'm also terrified of acting on impulse and doing it. Having those agreements in place can be kind of comforting.
I'm sorry you feel so isolated. In matters like this, even tho I have family, I also feel totally dependent on professionals (and to some extent on this board) because my family can't handle that kind of feelings. And those feelings are kind of isolating in themselves. I find myself in a grey fog where I can't see anything or anyone else sometimes.
I think it's wonderful that you reached out here. And I hope that in some way it can help you feel less isolated.
((Oddipus)) Things can and do get better. You're in a trough right now, and it's hard to remember that.
There is a medication or medication combination that can help. And seeing a counselor when you're feeling like this is a wonderful idea. And perhaps, just perhaps, you should stop watching the war coverage. You're probably vibrating like a tuning fork in connection with all the nastiness that is coming over the airwaves.
Take care and keep posting.
Dinah
poster:Dinah
thread:211953
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030322/msgs/211965.html