Posted by OddipusRex on March 23, 2003, at 20:20:33
If hospitals make you more suicidal what do you do? They make me feel trapped agitated and desperate and less safe physically. I also become obsessed with finding potential suicide instruments in the hospital. And it's pretty easy. There are more suicides in Hospitals than any other single place outside the home I think. But then how can you talk to anyone about being suicidal when all they say is do you want to be admitted. And I don't want to seem to threaten people if they have nothing to offer. I don't understand those doctors who say call me if you are suicidal. If I was suicidal why would I call him? To say goodbye? That's ridiculous I'm not some kind of emotional sadist. If he had anything to offer me anyway I hardly think he would be holding it back for "emergencies". What's the point? This is not a threat just a question.
I am quite isolated. There is no one nonprofessional I can turn too.
I believe in God but I was never taught that suicide was a sin. I can't grasp that. It seems like a good way to wipe out an ugly useless sinful life. I AM afraid of reincarnation. Somebody threaten me with another childhood fast!!!
Medicines don't do much good. I am way to wound up to risk an SSRI.They made me crazy. Parnate too. I'm taking fishoil and Adderall and SJW and prn xanax.
I have a lot of situational stress. Things are beyond my control there.
I've been obnoxious lately. Please prove your vast moral superiority over me by replying with kindness.
I'm not suicidal to the point of acting on it. I'm very depressed and anxiety through the roof.
poster:OddipusRex
thread:211953
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030322/msgs/211953.html