Posted by kiddo on November 4, 2001, at 0:52:01
In reply to breakdowns, posted by sar on October 27, 2001, at 20:37:22
> this question stems from a post i just read by Ms. Wendy:
>
> if you've had a breakdown, what would you describe it as?Being in a rowboat in the middle of a hurricane with no lighthouse to guide me. I had a breakdown in the summer of '96. It took everything that was in me to get out of bed. Sometimes it was in the late afternoon when my husband came home, sometimes not at all. I started to feel dead, then would cut and burn myself just to feel something, and other times I took pills to make me sleep so I wouldn't feel anything at all.
I went to the hospital the night I told my husband I was going to fill the car up with gas and then called my doctor to say goodbye. He picked up on it-I didn't tell him my plan. Then talked to me until I went to the hospital.
I feel like I'm close to that point again. Functioning is becoming a nightmare. I'm still fighting with my therapist's ex-partner and can't even find an attorney to TALK to me about it. What I need is someone that isn't afraid to take him on.
I really don't know how much more I can take. I'm having to drop my classes because of it, I've had 5 hours sleep in the past two days WITH enough sleeping pills to knock out a horse. I just don't think I'm strong enough to keep it going anymore. I'm ready to just give up.
Kiddo
poster:kiddo
thread:13047
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011025/msgs/13432.html