Posted by gardenergirl on June 18, 2006, at 15:10:01
In reply to Re: Any CBT or DBT or other advice? » pegasus, posted by Dinah on June 18, 2006, at 13:59:08
I love pegasus's idea. How moving and meaningful. I do think any kind of ritual like that can be helpful, but I think it may take some time to get to that point, too.
Distration is good. It helps us get through day to day things. From what I've learned and experienced so far, though, I think that you can't distract entirely. Experiencing grief and pain and anger and whatever difficult emotions are related is key to moving towards acceptance. Acceptance is key, imo, to letting go and moving forward, maybe even to forgiveness, but at the very least, to letting go. (Forgiveness is not necessary, imo.) I've been dealing with this myself about the things my husband did on my birthday and our anniversary last year. When my birthday came around this year, it brought all that pain back, and it was obvious I still needed to work on it.
One way I've seen that works with grief issues is writing letters to the person. These are letters that will never be sent. It might take one or it might take many. It IS important for someone to hear them, though. Reading it aloud to someone or sending it to someone you trust is important, otherwise, it remains sort of ephemeral. The idea about letters like this is that you do get to express anything and everything about what you feel about the loss and what it means, but in a safe way.
Take care,
gg
poster:gardenergirl
thread:658323
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/658380.html