Posted by 10derHeart on March 11, 2005, at 15:52:48
In reply to Re: You made it Dinah!!, posted by Annierose on March 11, 2005, at 14:28:40
Yeah, I was thinking of you today, too. Must feel good to have the world (okay - part of it anyway) "right" again. Just seeing your name these past days reminded me of your struggle with your T's absence. But come today, I'll admit it was my own stuff reminding me. Guess I'm somehow jealous. :-(
My current T. is great and has even brought up calling or emailing whenever I'm so stressed I feel I just can't wait until next session. He says a crisis is not necessary for that. Says he wants to hear from me. Sounds lovely...but, I likely won't do it. You know the "whys" of that - the discussion has taken place at great length here, hasn't it?
But the thing is, as I continue my (micro)baby- steps detaching fully from old T. (via email), stuff happens. Like today, I'm wanting to hear from him and haven't. Last week he revealed he was "having stress", but not to worry. Hah! Why do these T's say such ridiculous things?
So, I gave him space, even though he explicitly told me it wasn't necessary. For 8 days - which is a record for me. He has reliable habits, so normally he'd have answered me by now. So the mind races with thoughts of what horrible thing "stress" really meant. Old T. is so private and firm w/boundaries, that telling me he's stressed is comparable to someone spilling their guts about a serious personal/professional problem. And the man slipped last summer and mentioned a specific medical issue he has to consider, which could become serious. That's always in the back of my mind. Of course, he could have just taken the day off. I'm hoping that's the deal.
So, I sit, happy for you it's Friday, and frustrated for me that my Friday has not yet produced the result (i.e. email from old T) I NEED. I'm sounding awfully pathetic. Sorry, Dinah, for whining all over your thread here.
I do sincerely hope you and your T. reconnected nicely.
poster:10derHeart
thread:466711
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050305/msgs/469758.html