Posted by crushedout on January 6, 2004, at 23:43:39
In reply to Re: she said no so she passed the test » crushedout, posted by DaisyM on January 6, 2004, at 23:16:38
> >>>I don't really get that either. Rushed? Haven't you had a conversation, or 2 about what happened?
Yeah, now I'm not so sure I get it, either, except maybe she meant she'd have to give up her lunch or rush between sessions and that would make her feel harried. Or, maybe you're right and it's some kind of dance we're doing. I guess I should ask her on Thursday.
We had the one conversation, the day after she gave me the CD, in which she told me she had been confused herself, and that she had been enjoying my feelings for her. I loaned her "In Session" that day.
So, today, we ended up talking mostly about other stuff, but at one point, I saw the book on her shelf and I asked her if she'd read it. She said she'd read part of it and had a lot of thoughts she wanted to share with me but didn't want to flood me when I had other stuff I needed to talk about. She said in general, she thought we both needed to be more explicit about what was going on between us. That was all very intriguing but we went back to the topic we were discussing beforehand, and we never got back to that.
So now I'm really curious about her thoughts, which is a big part of why I wanted to schedule an extra session tomorrow, I guess. And that's the stuff we still have to talk about. I mean, she's told me she was enjoying my feelings for her, but that leaves a lot of open questions in my mind (such as, just how much was she enjoying them? does she have any feelings for me? has she talked to anyone about them? does she think she can deal with them, or are they going to interfere with our therapy? is there any risk she's going to suddenly terminate (because that would be good to know now) -- probably lots of other stuff. and I don't even know what *she* has in mind to talk about). And I expalined to her clearly in my phone message when I called her back that mainly I was worried we wouldn't have enough time before she went away to continue that conversation.
I wonder if she really just wanted space. I did feel like I was maybe being a little suffocating.
Thanks for your support, Daisy. Really, truly, it helps.
poster:crushedout
thread:296947
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040102/msgs/297462.html