Posted by Pfinstegg on September 2, 2006, at 20:52:32
In reply to friend dying, posted by Shortelise on September 2, 2006, at 13:00:39
Something I found really valuable when I was doing my (medical) internship was to just ask people who were dying about the happiest and most meaningful moments of their lives. They almost always were able to talk about wonderful moments with other people, things they had loved or found beautiful, personal challenges they were proud to have overcome- anything which was validating to them, and helped them to feel that their lives had contained joy and meaning. Twice, patients were able to continue sharing these memories happily until the moment they died. One even said, just as she died, "I'm so happy!"
Another very comforting thing can be to give a massage. Sometimes very ill patients have been starved of human touch for a long time just by being in the hospital. It can be done as just rubbing lotion onto dry skin- that way, it doesn't seem intrusive.
Just the fact of your going will be experienced as so validating and loving by her.
poster:Pfinstegg
thread:682310
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20051017/msgs/682461.html