Posted by All Done on March 22, 2005, at 1:52:37
In reply to Re: My dad, posted by gardenergirl on March 21, 2005, at 0:41:33
> Oh Laurie,
> I'm crying here, too. Although it started when I read the above thread. And I think it's PMS, cause I also cryed when they graduated at the end of Legally Blonde. Not to take anything away from these tears, D'oh! But I'm a cryer.
>
> Anyway, I have had some similar feelings when I talk to my younger cousins who never knew our grandpa. I was nine when he died. I remember him teaching us about science stuff and flying kites with him. And we always get out the slides my aunt has of all his photography. If you ever want to see a late 60's early 70's fashion show, just let me know. It's a riot. But the young cousins have no memories of these things except from the stories and from watching the slide shows. I remember those pants. And the trip to the air force base. And my cousin throwing up after the helicopter ride.
>
> At any rate, I am so glad you had those brief months. And in some ways, I think that is the nature of grandparenting. Parents get the chance to "do-over" what they may not have been able to do as well when they were in the thick of life with their own kids. And I imagine that is both a blessing and painful for the kid to see.
>
> It's so wonderful that you keep him alive for N. I really know almost nothing about my dad's dad. Apparently I met him once when I was a babe. But no one talks about him much. Heck, he had a whole new family whom I've met, but no one talks much about them, either.
>
> You are a super wonderful and caring mommy.
>
> gggg,
Didn't mean to make you cry, but I understand. Sometimes I cry at soup commercials or when someone wins big on a game show. It's really pathetic.
You know, I like that you brought up looking at the slides. My family used to pull out old 8mm home movies on the weekends. Most of the movies were of my (half) sisters, their mom, and our dad. I never knew their mom (she passed away and then my dad met and married my mom), but the movies helped me to know and understand a little more about her. Even without sound. I think it gave my sisters the opportunity to share what they remembered and loved about her. I will have to find every video I have with my dad in it for N to look at someday. The last video we have with him was N's christening. We had the minister who married us come to my parents' house to do it because my dad was so sick at that point. We knew he didn't have long to live. We kept it very small - just immediate family and his godparents. I picked something very short for my dad to read because his throat was so sore, but I desperately wanted him to have a part in it. He couldn't have read it more beautifully. He was so very proud. It was beautiful.
Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.Proverbs 17:6
Children's children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.I haven't been able to bring myself to watch the video yet, though. I don't know what I'm waiting for. There will never be a perfect time.
Sorry to go on and on. This thread is just bringing up lots of stuff for me.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and for being so sweet to me.
Laurie
poster:All Done
thread:473154
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20041230/msgs/473878.html