Psycho-Babble Grief | about grief, mourning, loss | Framed
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Re: Name a Pain » rayww

Posted by Sebastian on September 11, 2003, at 20:12:16

In reply to Re: Name a Pain, posted by rayww on September 11, 2003, at 16:26:50

Both, and most of the pain I felt in psychosis was on the inside although it seemed to start on the outside. Most of these times I wasn't taking medicine. The pain would consume me inside and out, I wouldn't move just sit and feel the pain because it wouldn't go away, it was horrible. I started small and got worse, I honstly don't remember how it stoped? Maybe someone would come home and threaten to take me to the doctor, because I was lying on the floor? It hurt, a lot.

The physical pain was when I didn't have control of my body, because I was still(not moving), I would lose track of surroundings(I still had the idea that my next more would hurt) but still I would move: hiting the spicet on the bathtub, fall in the shower, etc.. Once I spent 3 days in my room, I didn't move, not to eat, drink, or bathroom. This is what I did after the inner pain. I was still consumed with inner pain but inflicting outer pain as well. I spent months at a time doing this, I would stay in the place in the house that I was put: couch, floor, where ever. And not move, no mater how stiff and soure I was. I refused to eat as well, drink too. Its a good thing they put me on zyprexa! As long as I have been taking the medicine I am able to: eat, sleep, and live a normal life. Unfortunaty I have been taking zyprexa for 5 years now, still when I stop: All the pain, lack of sleep, and can't eat comes back. I want off the medicine so bad.

In need of major help

Sebastian


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poster:Sebastian thread:258691
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/259203.html