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Re: saying the right thing

Posted by morgan miller on December 23, 2010, at 23:21:32

In reply to Re: saying the right thing, posted by Dr. Bob on December 22, 2010, at 0:43:46

>> So, was it the uncivil wording I used that got me blocked, or was it the content of what I said that could lead you to feel accused or put down? I hope it was primarily the uncivil wording.

>Would you say the difference between an I-statement and a you-statement is the wording or the content? Would you like to give rephrasing a try now?

Are you asking me if I would like to rephrase this?

>I hope it was primarily the uncivil wording.

Or are you asking me to rephrase the original statement that lead to me being blocked for 2 weeks?

>Would you say the difference between an I-statement and a you-statement is the wording or the content?

The difference in an I-statement and a you-statement is wording, not content. It does not matter whether you use an I or you statement, the content is the same. The use of an I or you statement changes the how the statement is perceived and received by the individual reading it. For example, if you say "I feel that I was disrespected," instead of "You were disrespectful", you are not changing the content, just the way the person the message was made for might perceive/receive it. That's just my take on this subject.

Morgan


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20101201/msgs/974471.html