Posted by alexandra_k on November 14, 2010, at 1:44:49
In reply to Re: Number of blocks » alexandra_k, posted by Dinah on November 13, 2010, at 14:46:07
> ... Just don't let it get in the way of your obligations in school. That's important too.
But it is done now. The ill-formed question that was my passion for philosophy... It is resolved.
I have masses of stuff that needs to be operationalized properly and organized and edited... I'm too close to a finished product to not produce one now. But what drove me, why I wanted to do this... Is done. Once my thesis is submitted... It will be a closed chapter of my life.
My scholarship is up now. I didn't get into medical school. Realistically... I probably won't get funding to get into medical school to study here. Maybe it can work, but probably it can't.
I'm facing needing to get a job. I am really looking forward to having some money for the first time in my life. My wardrobe needs a total replacement. I would like to have an apartment to myself rather than living in student accommodation. I am scared about giving up my identity as a student. I am scared about what kind of work I can find and about finding something that hopefully has flexible hours and isn't too tedious / something that I don't hate. But I need to find something pronto... Figure I'll probably end up doing what the majority do here - do a graduate entry program and end up working in a government department. Pays well. Full of others who decided they didn't want to be academics / who didn't get an academic position.
Have leisure hours. Keep working in the gym. Keep learning about that stuff. I have an idea for modeling lever lengths and load for squatting (physics, who woulda thunk??) See what happens... I dunno...
Dan John has an online book... He needs an editor... But there is a chapter on 'success'. He writes how those who 'succeed' often lose their passion. Olympic athletes (athletes successful enough to go and even those successful enough to win) often can't bear to do their sport anymore after the event. He reccommends that people don't go to graduate school. He says he knows many creative writers who can't bear to write creatively after doing grad school in creative writing. I think there is something in this...
Sometimes the most passionate... The most inspired... Are those who don't reach what it is they aspire to. Sometimes reaching the goal... Well... There isn't anything left once it is obtained. It is empty. Sometimes... It is in the process.
I'll never be great at Olympic lifting. My levers are wrong. (But sometimes scientific models predict incorrectly because of oversimplifications that have been made). My technique can't be optimal because of joint immobility (but sometimes someone needs to do something different to result in progressive, better techniques). It is highly highly highly unlikely that I'll ever be good. And as such... I think I might just be passionate about it until the day I die.
But maybe not. Maybe other things will come along. Who cares. So long as passion for something remains life is worth living after all.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:969738
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20101014/msgs/970170.html