Posted by 10derHeart on September 8, 2008, at 23:18:41
In reply to Re: What is the opinion of the community on this?, posted by Marty on September 7, 2008, at 23:19:49
As a couple of people have mentioned this, I just wanted to express my opinion on deputies having email addresses and/or other personal information.
I do not want access to this information for any reason. I don't feel comfortable at all with the responsibility or the stress and issues it would inevitably bring up. It's not what I signed on for, and I would never agree to it.
When I became a deputy, it was made explicitly clear that *any and all* deputy duties were entirely voluntary. Dr. Bob has been basically true to that, although he has asked us to do more in general in recent months as his absences have increased. That is *asking* though, and we are not compelled or pressured to do anything, except perhaps by our own internal state - i.e., concern for the posters in this community, loyalty and caring for Dr. Bob, or a sense of personal responsibility about certain areas.
But I digress - strictly on the topic of suicidal posters, I do not want the information for that purpose either. I am not qualified or trained. I leave this to the professionals who have some idea how to approach these sad and stressful events. If others feel comfortable, that is wonderful, and I admire them greatly, and am so thankful they are there to try to help. I do not have the strength or confidence to do that, at least not in a venue like Babble. I *have* done it IRL, as a supervisor and friend - I won't share the details, but there were mixed outcomes. I do have personal triggers and other factors that would completely preclude me from being depended on to handle these situations as part of the deputy role here.
I would never agree to an expectation of me as a deputy to decide whether or no to call an ISP, the police or a poster. It's not something I feel capable of or frankly, interested in attempting in any way, shape or form. Dr. Bob knows this full well, and still sees me as a fit and good [or good enough - I guess] deputy. He doesn't hold this as a requirement. He understands when we don't feel up to doing the most mundane of deputy duties, for hours, days or weeks even. He generally tells us to take care of our physical and mental health first, and that we do not have to act at all, should we not be able or willing.
I do what I can to help when time is of the essence, as it clearly was this time, and I did forward some information back and forth between people. But, I can't and won't take on responsibility to the extent that it seems might be assumed, imagined or desired by the community. I am sorry if this is disappointing :-(
This is my own view - the other deputies may feel quite differently, of course.
poster:10derHeart
thread:850103
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20080719/msgs/851108.html