Posted by garnet71 on June 24, 2009, at 6:21:03
In reply to Re: Help - trigger - scared, posted by morganpmiller on June 24, 2009, at 3:38:29
Thanks Morgan, well I slept 4 hours and feel better as far as stability terms, woke up with a headache.I'm not sure why i can't sleep longer even when i try. I feel like sh*t.
My vision was getting hallucinatory last night and I was scared. It was weird because it felt like my brain cells were vibrating too, then my body had a vibrating kind of anxiety like something was trying to emerge. Does that feeling happen before psychosis?
I've had distorted vision for over 6 months now, just bent lines in my periphial vision, but forgot to tell PDoc. Opthamologist couldn't see anything. But last night was different. The font on the screen got real thick and black in just some places and the colors changed, like big grey bands.
But the past 3 weeks i haven't been eating good or sleeping hardly at all.
I have nicotone gum and now got cigarettes. I just took a multi B, but that seems kind of silly.lol
I'm really wishing I never started psychoanalysis, but who knew after 2 meetings that I'd get unstable like this? I've been pretty stable despite my life hanging by a thread.
I just read that the transference reaction of psycoanalysis can cause an acute psychosis, or bring out a hidden psychosis. But i didn't read that until after i sensed it, so it wasn't an idea i put in my head.
I'm still scared but don't know if i want to call pdoc today. I have so much this week for school. I feel like if i talk to him, i'll start hallucinating. I don't have any paranoia or delusionary thinking or anything else. I'm not a big xanax user, usually took .25 or .5 a day. PDoc gave me more, and I had mentioned wanting to go off it/taper. Not sure if a small amount of xanax could have that effect. I do take 1 mg with a panic attack or severe anxiety.
Maybe my dopamine system changed, and after quitting d-amp for a week, then starting back up on it the day before yesterday, maybe that has effected me too. Don't know how dopamine can suddenly change, but it was like a switch went off in my brain during 2nd trial of psychoanalysis.
Thanks for the advice, it's nice to hear your support.
poster:garnet71
thread:902873
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090620/msgs/902899.html