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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 7 to 31 of 31. Go back in thread:
Posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 7:59:44
In reply to My therapist is counting on you guys., posted by daisym on June 24, 2005, at 1:22:24
>> OH, Daisy post all day long everyday and we will help you get through this. You can count on us! If we don't hear from you we will be asking about you so don't be too surprised! Your T can count on us! :)
>
> . I better go buy some more cream of wheat. And liver worst. And cheese cake. And...
>
> I hope you don't eat this all together! lol What a combination! I love all 3 but, it sounds like you are preganant! lol Maybe you could add a pickle to the liver worst! lol I love cream of wheat, it is such a happy memory of my childhood sitter. But I like the real stuff, not instant, made with milk! yum! I might have to buy some! :)Anyways, you can do this Daisy, please lean on us, okay?
Posted by daisym on June 24, 2005, at 10:08:28
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » daisym, posted by Jazzed on June 24, 2005, at 7:12:26
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040812/msgs/377002.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040812/msgs/377075.htmlI've linked last year's posts about vacation above, but I think you'll have to cut and paste. It was in the week of Aug 12, 04, one has a subject line of 'More.' I'm a little chagrined that I wrote so much of the same thing. You'd think there would be more progress in a year. *sigh* I think I'm a a therapy snail. However, it was fun to run into the Therapist On Vacation club again. I'd forgotten about that.
As far as my husband - no, he doesn't know the extent of my attachment. But he is trying to be supportive because I've scared him a few times. Other times he says unflattering things about therapists as a group and thinks "this guy is playing with your head." I call him Archie when he starts to do this, after Archie Bunker.
I don't think my therapist reads here. I think he would tell me, but I'm not sure. I don't refer to Babble by name, just "the board." He does think a book on termination is a great idea, btw, but he said to call it something else, he hates that word. I don't want him to read here. It would stifle me. I already feel like I do too much "he said" then "I said" etc. Sometimes I feel like I'm writing about boys in high school. (sheepish grin.)
I hope I remembered all your questions.
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:47:19
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » daisym, posted by Shortelise on June 24, 2005, at 5:05:55
Funny that you put it that way, ShortE, I sort of wailed at Falls last night that "I was sad and lonely and needed a mommy."
Wednesday I had a huge triggering incident and I let go completely in my therapist's office. It didn't last long, but as I quieted down, he said, "how are you calming yourself right now?" My answer was "air. Just air. Just breathing." I believe in the power of deep breaths but I'm a shallow breather. So I've trained myself that every time I look at a clock, I take a deep breath. I'm sure people think I'm absolutely nuts. :)
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:50:11
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » daisym, posted by fallsfall on June 24, 2005, at 7:16:52
Promise? :(
I'm bouncing between thinking it is stupid not to admit how sad I feel and feeling stupid for feeling so sad.
I'm glad there is no drought and that the Falls will keep falling.
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:54:09
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » daisym, posted by Dinah on June 24, 2005, at 7:43:41
Thanks for the reminder that it will be good for him, Dinah. Somewhere inside I know that.
I do have tons and tons of work to do. I hope to catch up. I'm going to try to not completely isolate myself, even if that is what my instincts tell me to do. Maybe we should invent a resort for folks whose therapists are on vacation. A retreat into a soothing atmosphere where you would have support and lots of ice cream.
Hmmm...maybe I just hit on my million dollar idea.
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:56:40
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys.daisym, posted by LadyBug on June 24, 2005, at 7:54:01
Thanks Lady. How did you end up with a picture of your therapist? I'm glad I'm not the only one who uses these things to keep the connection alive. I know from your previous posts that you have a great therapist and you do understand how intense it feels to miss them.
I'll probably write more than I should. Just yell "stop" when it is too much.
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:58:56
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys., posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 7:59:44
Bite your tongue, Happy. Pregnant! God forbid, I'm almost done. I'm glad you like COW too. I get a lot of flack for that here.
I always wonder if I've picked comfort foods that are bad for me as a way of rebelling against something. I'll have to think about that more.
Posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 13:13:17
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » happyflower, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:58:56
> Bite your tongue, Happy. Pregnant! God forbid, I'm almost done. I'm glad you like COW too. I get a lot of flack for that here.
>HeeHee! Could you be? lol Just kidding! So why do they give you flack for COW? They don't know anything! lol My husband wouldn't touch the stuff before we were married, and now he likes it as much as I do. But being about 98 degrees in Indiana, I think it is too hot to eat right now.
> I always wonder if I've picked comfort foods that are bad for me as a way of rebelling against something. I'll have to think about that more.
>
Well cream of wheat is good for you unless you are on a low carb diet, cheesecake, good source of calcium, and well the other (liver pate) is good for something I am sure, I don't know what, but it has to be good for you! :)
>
Posted by Shortelise on June 24, 2005, at 13:15:18
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Shortelise, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:47:19
Daisy, that's a great idea - a deep breath when you look at the clock. I will now try to do the same.
When I was going through a very deep attachment, Mommy type, with my T, I got a very sweet Piglet, so soft and ever so cute, and I carried him around with me. He sat in my handbag, and people could see him, and they were so nice! That I had this little guy with me seemed to soften people, they smiled at me, were friendlier ... it was as though Piglet were saying, hey, this is a nice person, a gentle vulnerable person you don't have to be defensive with so it's ok to be nice.
It changed everything. It was the beginning of learning that how people treat me is largely dependent on me. I know, that has nothing to do with you here and now *except* that I was treated very kindly during a time when I needed to be.
ShortE
Posted by Tamar on June 24, 2005, at 15:01:47
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys., posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 13:13:17
I was reading here for ages before I realised what COW was. I had visions of people eating an actual cow...
> Well cream of wheat is good for you unless you are on a low carb diet, cheesecake, good source of calcium, and well the other (liver pate) is good for something I am sure, I don't know what, but it has to be good for you! :)
Anything with liver in it will be full of vitamin A. Very good for you indeed, unless you're pregnant, in which case don't touch it!
Daisy, come and write here as much as you need to. We’re here until your therapist gets back, and after too... Keep posting.Tamar
Posted by gardenergirl on June 24, 2005, at 15:13:32
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Dinah, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:54:09
OMG, I think you did hit on it! It could be a requirement for therapy. :)
Ice cream, massages if you want, shoe shops galore with no cash register, sleep overs in each other's bungalow...
Oh and btw, gg reporting for duty. :Dgg
Posted by antigua on June 24, 2005, at 15:43:43
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » fallsfall, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:50:11
I have plenty of strength. I've been holding my breath for three weeks--my T just came BACK from vacation. Funny thing, this year was harder than others in the past, maybe because our relationship has shifted this year. But I made it. And you will too!
So I'm here, Daisy, ready with lemonade and chocolate chip cookies!!
antigua
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 16:12:45
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Daisym, posted by gardenergirl on June 24, 2005, at 15:13:32
I'm so glad you said bungalow. I hate camping, so no tents, please! But sleep overs sound nice. We could play truth or dare...hey, kinda like REAL therapy.
Oh, sorry, I guess that is "truth if you dare..."
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 16:17:29
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys., posted by Tamar on June 24, 2005, at 15:01:47
I'm hoping we can continue "talking" in the thread above. I'm working on a reply, it is too long to post just yet.
Everything gets shortened here. It took me forever to figure out what LMAO meant. I kept thinking it was "Let me at ??" or "little more action oriented" or...well, you can see how it gets confusing.
Posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 16:32:42
In reply to I'm here, posted by antigua on June 24, 2005, at 15:43:43
Gee, Antigua, three weeks and you didn't even whine once. I wish I was as strong. I'm sure you missed her a lot because you've had so many shifts lately. I'm glad she is safely back.
I think little daisy is still pretty out and I'm feeling very 9ish. I called my therapist's office a little bit ago, just to "prove" that he is really gone. I knew he'd have a message up about being away and his back up, etc. Well, (gasp!) imagine my face when it wasn't his voice but rather his wife's on the message machine. I know they share the phone line but it has always been him saying, "push 1 to leave a message for 'her'" and for him to wait for the beep. Now she says, "we're gone, blah, blah, blah, push 1 to leave a message for me and wait for the beep to leave a message for him." So he isn't on there anywhere. It is silly and infantile and yet it feels like another blow -- he's completely gone! I'm so glad he left me a voice mail. I can't imagine what it would feel like if he hadn't. (OK, chapter 3 or 4 of "In Session" - ascribing inordinate importance to little things. I know, I know...)
I can't help it.
Posted by Jazzed on June 24, 2005, at 16:43:44
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Shortelise, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:47:19
>Just air. Just breathing." I believe in the power of deep breaths but I'm a shallow breather. So I've trained myself that every time I look at a clock, I take a deep breath. I'm sure people think I'm absolutely nuts. :)
Deep breathing is awesome, isn't it? When I get anxious deep breathing sometimes saves me.
Jazzy
Posted by Jazzed on June 24, 2005, at 16:46:10
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys.daisym » LadyBug, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:56:40
>
> I'll probably write more than I should. Just yell "stop" when it is too much.Keep talking, keep talking, it keeps you busy and occupied! ; )
Jazzy
Posted by sleepygirl on June 24, 2005, at 17:18:38
In reply to My therapist is counting on you guys., posted by daisym on June 24, 2005, at 1:22:24
go ahead, I am on of the biggest babies of them all.
Posted by Dinah on June 24, 2005, at 20:09:03
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Dinah, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:54:09
He'll be on vacation for one week. I'll be on vacation the next. So two weeks.
I was trying to be so grownup today when he told me. I reminded myself how much less my dependence has gotten. And how I feel so much more secure now that he'll be there.
But inside I was sitting there feeling a big hole in my gut, saying "two weeks...."
It isn't possible for me to cancel my vacation, thank heavens. Because it would really be selfish of me to do that to my family. We almost never go away. I'd be tempted.
But...
Two weeks...I was wondering why I had a forgetting sleep this afternoon. I wonder if that was it.
So let's get this resort up and running.
:((((
I just want to burrow into his side and never leave.
Summers. :(
Posted by LadyBug on June 24, 2005, at 22:47:18
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys.daisym, posted by LadyBug on June 24, 2005, at 7:54:01
You asked how I got a picture of her. Well she has let me take my camera in a few times. I thought it was so nice and thoughtful of her. She said if it helped me stay connected, she'd let me take 100 pictures!!! One of the pictures turned out really good so I had a 5 by 7 made for her as well as a 4 by 6. She loved it and said it was the best picture of her she had ever had taken. I was delighted!
Then a week later she decided the pictures I gave to her were "gifts" to her and that started a whole discussion. I don't do "gifts" any more, I did in the past but it got way out of control and she had to say "No more". Gifts can confuse the therapy relationship. I've learned to talk about things rather than hide behind a gift. I wanted her to like me and the gifts were my way of making sure she liked me, how could she refuse???!!! I was being so thoughtful and generous. Live and learn in therapy!!!LadyBug
Posted by sleepygirl on June 24, 2005, at 23:19:36
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guysDaisym, posted by LadyBug on June 24, 2005, at 22:47:18
You know for whatever reason one day I was sitting in the waiting room....well waiting, so I decided to take pictures of the waiting room with my camera phone. I had been taking all sorts of pictures with it, i.e. the cats, my butt, my friends, whatever. Well anyway, I found it strangely comforting. I might have to stare at them when he goes on vacation (the nerve).
-feeling quite freakish about that, maybe I'll have to go away for 2 weeks too next month,
sleepy
Posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 23:25:36
In reply to pictures of the T's office, posted by sleepygirl on June 24, 2005, at 23:19:36
What an awesome idea Ladybug! That way he doesn't have to know. But of course what if you get caught, mine would think I am being a spy or something.
Posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 23:42:40
In reply to Re: pictures of the T's office » sleepygirl, posted by happyflower on June 24, 2005, at 23:25:36
Posted by pegasus on June 25, 2005, at 12:26:37
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Dinah, posted by Daisym on June 24, 2005, at 12:54:09
Oh, yeah! I would book my vacations there! We'll need daily support group sessions where everyone gets to talk about their therapist to their heart's content without anyone else acting bored. And a library filled with psych books, and beautiful supplies for journaling.
pegasus
Posted by pegasus on June 25, 2005, at 12:32:06
In reply to Re: My therapist is counting on you guys. » Daisym, posted by pegasus on June 25, 2005, at 12:26:37
Also, I meant to offer my sporadic, one-handed typing style of support while your T is gone. T vacations can be soooo hard, and I'm glad your T is smart enough to send you to babble for support. Babble won't let him or you down.
pegasus
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