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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 42. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:02:42
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:08:28
In reply to yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:02:42
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:18:03
In reply to Re: yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:08:28
' no postcode envy'. she's from devonport and went pakuranga college ffs. these things are relative, i suppose...
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 2:04:11
In reply to Re: yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:18:03
actually, that is sort of... being happy for the kiwi. some sort of... nationalism. i guess.
i found this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gpdY8ueSCZU
calvin harris yay. actually... i discovered he did a bbc radio 1 essential mix - which sorta surprised me. i just knew him for his... nostalgia song that i like... i didn't realise he was... less... cheesy??
anyway... 2nd song... that is it. but of course i know the 3rd song, too.
nostalgia. for weltec. i guess... my time at weltec will go down as the time where i was the fittest i've ever been in my whole life. able to move the most weights etc. a serious competitor against the 18 year olds ha!! and in my early 30's...
i don't seem able to sustain more than one obsession at a time. and i'm back to academics. so... getting chubbier as we speak. holding onto the elusive chin up. but saying goodbye to multiples, indeed. and saying goodbye to close to a 2x bodyweight deadlift, too.
back to... the gym mostly being about trying to undo the damage i do by sitting all day.
sigh.
i've decided... i think i have about the best room in this whole tower block. any higher and... you lose some of the nicer perspective on the buildings. any lower... and you lose the privacy of people not being able to see when you are lying in bed. any to the left and you lose the harbour. any to the right and you lose the sky tower. which is a casino which i actually feel ambivalent about... but it is a city landmark. the city landmark. and it is nice to have the option...
i've been reading student blogs. a lot of them seem to be about coming to terms with... a 'work-life balance'. with... being a bit less serious about their studies than they had envisaged for themselves...
what i'm making of it now is that... well... most people really do want a balance. they want to find a life partner. they want to have a close social group. they want to have kids and stuff like that. they want a boat or to travel or whatever. they want a certain amount of money to send their kids to good schools...
and they start out uni thinking that they are going to work really hard and do really well...
and then...
for non-arts / social science subjects, at least... they find that they don't get so very much of a fresh start at all. it is more of high school curriculum - and a little bit more. so if you worked very hard at / did very well at high school physics / maths / chemistry / biology then you have a solid... foundation. most of it is repetition... with a little bit more. and you can focus on learning / understanding that little bit more - to do really very well. whereas if you didn't really master things at high school... you are still struggling to play catch-up.
and for most people... it simply isn't worth it. and also... you can't really do it. because it is a bit too much. and because uni isn't designed / for people to be playing catch-up. so... you missed the boat. thanks for playing. just as well you have *already* (most of you) decided that academics wasn't really your thing, anyway. you were (always) more into the social connections or whatever... than you were interested in focusing on your studies, anyway. that was why you didn't do better in school...
but some people... don't need a work-life balance. because some people... LOVE their work. if you really feel passionately about what you are studying... and you meet people who are similar... where your main social activity is... group study... well... you are almost a different breed of people. the ones who... do do well. because... you don't want very much of the way of anything else. it isn't about sacrificing what is important to you... it is more about finding what is important.
and about... other people supporting you to... allowing you to... do your thing.
and so... there about 2x as many people who start out wanting to do med than who ever are viable candidates (org chem, mostly, but that's symptomatic of ill preparedness from school more generally). then amongst those... well... i have started noticing people who you would... well... you would never (i mean never) put them in front of patients. and i'm fairly sure they wouldn't want to be put in front of patients either. honestly. and so... i think it is okay. just relax into whatever... and things will work out in the end.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 2:16:19
In reply to Re: calvin harris, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 2:04:11
i am worried...
my time in australia... living in hall of residence... i made some wonderful friends. i mean really. some people i want to stay in touch with forever. and i have some wonderful memories of time spent with them. i mean, really. i think they always will be some of the very best memories of my life.
but also...
at some point i needed to move. into a different wing. i needed to have friends who i could go and visit when i was up to it. and who i could shut myself away from when i was up to that, too. i needed to be able to relax that people wouldn't be knocking on my door (we know you are in there). where i could just ignore my phone. where i could just relax into solitude. my sanctuary.
i don't know how to do that. how to explain that. how to be... without some physical distance between.
the 500 meters served me quite well.
and so...
here...
in a way...
i can't imagine anything worse than getting to know the people living on my floor. because if i get to know them... then they will know... they will know when i'm here. when i'm not here. i mean... i already know when stompy guy upstairs is home or not. i already know when guy next door is home or not. i think he has noisy girlfriend on this floor, too, and noise travels completely from the hallway so you always know when they are on their way in / out. if i don't have faces to them... it is okay. i'm scared that getting to know them will ruin things.
but.... i do want to make friends. i want the opportunity to have friends here. more of those good life friendships. sure.
and good memories too.
which... ar emostly drunken :(
my supervisor said (and i know it is true): you are a much different person when drunk. much... better / nicer / more fun.
and it is true.
i am less grumpy. more relaxed. i enjoy people. i'm desensitised to them. i find jostling fine. joking fun. teasing to be... how teasing is meant to be. i... really enjoy people when i'm trashed. really, a lot. and most of my good memoeires of them are of drinking and hanging out and chatting / playing with people.
:(
perhaps i'm just going to have to get fat and drunken after all.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 3:31:44
In reply to Re: friends vs privacy, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 2:16:19
Posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:49:47
In reply to Re: friends vs privacy, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 3:31:44
Posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:51:11
In reply to Stop flouting the 3 post rule Have a drink PLEASE (nm) » alexandra_k, posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:49:47
Posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:54:56
In reply to lorde makes warm puppy noises (nm), posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:51:11
Posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:56:33
In reply to kiwi chauvinism is unattractive (nm), posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:54:56
Posted by Partlycloudy on January 27, 2014, at 7:03:19
In reply to yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:02:42
Yay Lorde indeed. She was brilliant. I was excited to see such an amazing talent from N.Z. win.
It is a vicarious thrill for a fellow citizen (speaking as a Canadian).
Posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 8:23:48
In reply to yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 0:02:42
Hi, Alexandra.
Just as a friendly reminder...
Here are the policies regarding submitting consecutive posts:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#three
Try to remain focused on the positive and reject the negative - perhaps by ignoring it. You have already achieved a great deal. You might not be a genius - but neither am I. That's not to say that you cannot achieve brilliance.
"Many of the most significant contributions to mankind
involve the uncommon application of common sense
rather than the common misapplication of genius."Good luck in school.
- Scott
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 18:53:15
In reply to Stop flouting the 3 post rule Have a drink PLEASE (nm) » alexandra_k, posted by HomelyCygnet on January 27, 2014, at 6:49:47
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 18:57:22
In reply to Re: yay lorde, posted by Partlycloudy on January 27, 2014, at 7:03:19
I think it is a catchy song. There is some quality in her voice that I find distinctive / different / pleasing.
I think it is a bit like... Being proud of someone from your state when they do well. Perhaps to think of it that way. Especially if you are from one of the 'underdog' states. NZ... I think the population is a bit less than the state of North Carolina. There aren't all that many more people in the whole of NZ than there are in Sydney. So when we do get something... To excel in a sport nobody cares about (or two) or get something like Flight of the Conchords or are part of the history of people like That chick off True Blood or Temuera Morrison or... Well... Consensus is that Australia can keep Russel Crowe... But it makes us feel kinda proud. Yeah.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 19:02:31
In reply to Re: yay lorde » alexandra_k, posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 8:23:48
I don't really believe in genius. Though of course 'it depends on what you mean by...'
I actually read something just now in an introductory book on engineering... It said that when the PERSON was important they tend to be regarded as a bit of a nutter and ignored. But when the INVENTION was imminent (because of the times)... There was something of a race / independent discovery / convergence to get there. The important or distinctive people... I guess that is (at least part of) what we are trying to capture (sometimes anyway) with 'genius'.
I don't suppose I'm that. But who knows what I'll go on to do...
I think there is something to what my supervisor said about how you may as well forget it / put it out of your head... I mean, it isn't like you have any control over that. All you can do is the best you can do with what you have got.
I think it is a bit like the gym... I'm not a natural athlete. I'm too old to have started training at 30. But I worked my *ss off and achieved more than most people ever achieve. Even though most people would outperform me significantly if they put the amount of work into it that I did.
Does my posting more than 3 posts in a row upset you, somehow? Or is it just that it is against the rules and you would like me punished / blocked?
Posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 20:57:52
In reply to Re: yay lorde » SLS, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 19:02:31
> Does my posting more than 3 posts in a row upset you, somehow?
I noticed it.
> Or is it just that it is against the rules and you would like me punished / blocked?
Did you knowingly break the rules?
It was my thought that you perhaps were unaware of the rules, so I thought a "friendly reminder" was more tactful than yelling at you on the subject line.
Did my reminder upset you somehow?
I do not currently wish to see you punished / blocked.
- Scott
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 22:16:05
In reply to Re: yay lorde » alexandra_k, posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 20:57:52
i don't know why people keep asking if i'm upset...
i am affected quite a lot at a certain time each month. it is fairly predictable... but i'm fine now :)
i do know about the 3 post rule...
and i try... but sometimes i fail.
i am feeling a bit bad about having gone off at the management people here about the cockroaches, now. my little friend has gone away. and i don't suppose i'll get them back now, that i know they are lurking, so i'm specially careful to clean up all dishes / crumbs from the sink each night. i guess it was more the thought of that before... before i wasn't especially careful about keeping things like oats or flour or sultanas or sugar in tightly sealed containers. shaking out my toaster after each use. now... i will be.
we got an email about orientation week. and... yeah... pretty full on... i... was going to not do any of it. but will be hard to hide in my room... and i'll hate myself if i try and be all anti-social. and i don't want to be anti-social really. so... i'm not entirely sure i can find the right balance. of starting off as i mean to go on... i don't quite know.
i just... really love where i am right now. i don't want to ruin it. i don't want to ruin it by getting to know people on the floor and then feeling like i've lost my privacy. to have other people noticing... then it isn't far from having other people commenting... then other people taking it personally that i'm not hanging out with them / that i'm ignoring them... then people turning on me... it's a pattern... it's why i need to not live with people. here is all wonderful and self contained. i can come and go as i please. i don't have to try and sneak around or be silent so other people will leave me alone. if i accidentally make a noise i don't have people around me making noises back in an attempt to (probably unconsciously) resonate with me in some way... i just want to keep that space.
find friends... who live... elsewhere.
hopefully... there are more people like me around than i fear there might be.
we got an email about speed flatmate matching too lol. poor poor people trying to find people to flat with. i'm so happy i don't need to go through that. i just... really don't like living with other people. so it makes it hard... i sort of have to pretend that i want to live with people but i don't. it isn't personal.. it is just... ugh. i'm so very very very very very glad that i don't have to go there.
interview tomorrow...
Posted by 10derheart on January 27, 2014, at 22:16:47
In reply to Re: yay lorde » alexandra_k, posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 20:57:52
Maybe I'm biased since I never supported this rule and still don't, but I thought maybe you posted the link so alex could remind herself that there are exceptions to this rule....
Since I -IF I were asked in the past to decide in a deputy capacity - would see her posts as a form of journaling/diary, rather than someone *appearing to* (can't know intent...) monopolize someone else's thread. I always thought Dr. Bob's idea was to allow dialog, so that threads would be back and forth, so I figure when you are posting many responses to your own thread....no big deal.
It's all interpretation, of course. And I have less than zero say/sway here.
I do like to think of you both as positively motivated.
Posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 22:47:07
In reply to Re: yay lorde » SLS, posted by 10derheart on January 27, 2014, at 22:16:47
I thought the diary exclusion was meant to track one's treatment on the Medication board. I see your point, though. A social diary is still a diary.
I really was not upset that Alexandra was submitting more than 3 consecutive posts. I took note of it, but didn't think it was something I should notify administration about. I must be missing something, though. I was under the impression that it was someone else who first suggested to Alexandra that she should stop flouting the 3 post rule. Perhaps it was simply a joke among friends. I didn't think so at the time. I was hoping to prevent administrative action, not encourage it.
- Scott
Posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 22:52:34
In reply to Re: the social thing..., posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 22:16:05
> i don't know why people keep asking if i'm upset...
You asked if I was upset.
- Scott
Posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 23:42:43
In reply to Re: yay lorde » 10derheart, posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 22:47:07
> I thought the diary exclusion...
oh. i didn't know about that.
> I was under the impression that it was someone else who first suggested to Alexandra that she should stop flouting the 3 post rule.
Dr Bob mentions it, sometimes.
i do try not to... but sometimes i get carried away...
Posted by SLS on January 28, 2014, at 0:00:54
In reply to Re: yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 27, 2014, at 23:42:43
> > I thought the diary exclusion...
>
> oh. i didn't know about that.
>
> > I was under the impression that it was someone else who first suggested to Alexandra that she should stop flouting the 3 post rule.
>
> Dr Bob mentions it, sometimes.
>
> i do try not to... but sometimes i get carried away...I understand.
I meant no harm.
- Scott
Posted by alexandra_k on January 28, 2014, at 0:04:32
In reply to Re: yay lorde » alexandra_k, posted by SLS on January 28, 2014, at 0:00:54
it's ok.
maybe i get to join the adorable duckie and lou pilder group :)
Posted by alexandra_k on January 28, 2014, at 0:05:23
In reply to Re: yay lorde, posted by alexandra_k on January 28, 2014, at 0:04:32
or maybe i won't, and i'll get blocked.
:(
i don't know.
Posted by 10derheart on January 28, 2014, at 2:21:57
In reply to Re: yay lorde » 10derheart, posted by SLS on January 27, 2014, at 22:47:07
>>I was under the impression that it was someone else who first suggested to Alexandra that she should stop flouting the 3 post rule.
It was. That's a fact. Not an impression:-) I didn't mention who was first, etc....did I? (ooo...who's on First? baseball!!!)
>>Perhaps it was simply a joke among friends. I didn't think so at the time.
Who knows? There are negative comments, then apologies, quiet, yelling, more quiet, lots more negative comments, nice comments, calm comments....are some jokes? <shrug> Friends? I wouldn't dare guess about that concept on Babble. For me, not a lot of what the onenoteduck posts in negative posts is funny at all.
>> I was hoping to prevent administrative action, not encourage it.
I know. That's one reason I'd hoped maybe you were thinking she could tell her "friend" she was journaling.
All is well....well....sorta.
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