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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by gadchik on January 4, 2012, at 10:35:59
Well, its a new year.Another year.As usual,I am questioning-do i need klonopin? Am I willing to try to do w/o it? Cant i just accept feeling like crap for-i dont really know how long-in order to taper off? Then night comes,and I just take the whole pill.
Posted by sleepygirl2 on January 4, 2012, at 19:04:50
In reply to New Year,but am I willing?, posted by gadchik on January 4, 2012, at 10:35:59
It's a dilemma isn't it?
I'd like to get off my meds, but I don't want to feel like crap, even if it is just my body adapting to the absence of meds.
Posted by Phillipa on January 5, 2012, at 10:09:07
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » gadchik, posted by sleepygirl2 on January 4, 2012, at 19:04:50
Personally if a med worked well for me I'd continue it as might not forever and I take till dosen't. Quality of life is a gift. Phillipa
Posted by gadchik on January 5, 2012, at 13:46:48
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by Phillipa on January 5, 2012, at 10:09:07
well spoken,phillipa.And a lesson for me;be thankful that Something works,in this case,a benzo!
Posted by Phillipa on January 5, 2012, at 20:46:13
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Phillipa, posted by gadchik on January 5, 2012, at 13:46:48
If it's not broken don't try to fix it as my retired pdoc used to say. Phillipa
Posted by Beckett on January 17, 2012, at 14:24:07
In reply to New Year,but am I willing?, posted by gadchik on January 4, 2012, at 10:35:59
> Well, its a new year.Another year.As usual,I am questioning-do i need klonopin? Am I willing to try to do w/o it? Cant i just accept feeling like crap for-i dont really know how long-in order to taper off? Then night comes,and I just take the whole pill.
gadchik,
I am thinking of asking my pdoc to increase my benzodiazepine intake. I am tired of fighting it. I am always shaving bits off, taking less. I take Xanax, the evil pill. If he gave me klonopin, I wouldn't care.
Can I ask how much you take? Is that rude? If it is, just pretend the winter wind blew in a sudden gust and you didn't hear.
I am tired of feeling subhuman and dour.
Posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 7:09:09
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » gadchik, posted by Beckett on January 17, 2012, at 14:24:07
I just saw your message.I only take .5mg klonopin.Ive had guilt about it,feeling as if I use a crutch.My pdoc likes xanax,and initially prescribed it.I didnt like it,because it felt too strong,and k feels mellower to me.But anyway,she tells me,"you have panic and the benzos treat that best".She also says,"if you need to take a benzo everyday,so be it"She would like me to take 1mg a day,i am also tired of fighting it,tired of worrying about the future of taking k everyday.I dont know what to do.Im at a time in my life where Im not working,I enjoy my day.Yet,I am perimenopausal and have a 19yr old,so still some stress.
Posted by Beckett on January 20, 2012, at 9:32:56
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Beckett, posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 7:09:09
K seems mellower as I recall. I switched from regular Xanax to the XR version to get away from the zippy up and down of Xanax, not at all good for anxiety IMO.
I feel like the .5 of x I take doesn't cut it. I am scripted for a full 1.0 but won't take it. I would rather take a fuller amount of K for some reason. It seems less something. I can't think of the word. That I would be able to cut back more easily. I do not feel that way about x. I could be very mistaken, but feel x is a more difficult habit to cut back.
Both are hard to stop all together. I don't advise people start benzodiazepines who have not started them. However, they have their place. They oddly enough have made my family's life a little easier though they are not aware it.
Too much time is wasted on guilt, don't you think gadchik. I think so at least. I do so precious little. I am so mild. If I take k then as your shrink says, so be it. Thanks for your response.
Posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 11:14:50
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by Beckett on January 20, 2012, at 9:32:56
Have you tried decreasing the dose?Ive tried and end up feeling so crappy.My husband keeps saying I should take zoloft again(i lost 25lbs of the 30 or more I gained on it)and get off k.He takes 50mg z a day,and loves it.I think my biggest fear is not being on a med.What will happen?I worry that I will become psychotic as I try to taper k.I havent felt depressed since 2008,no panic attacks that k didnt stop dead.But what of the long term affects?Will I be an old lady with a fried brain?Will I be begging for k if I run out?Depending on a substance so completely,terrifies me.Yet,at night,when I take my k,it feels right,like its filling a hole that shouldnt be there.
Posted by Beckett on January 20, 2012, at 11:29:16
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Beckett, posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 11:14:50
I have tried to decrease and cannot get below .25mg. My pdoc says not to worry and also that it really is difficult to come off a benzo of any sort--it takes much longer for some of us than many tapering schedules call for. He also says, and I happen to agree because of my experiences, that the benzos hit anxiety in a direct way that zoloft, say, does not. So if zoloft works for your hubby, that's good, however, I don't personally see taking zoloft as superior to a low dose benzo. I see the dose of k you take, gadchik, as very low dose. I don't anticipate you having a fried brain. That sounds like the sort of thing an anxious person should not tell themselves--and exactly what they will! But I am tired of fighting with the options and reading and being afraid. At my age, if I take klonopin or even Xanax at my dose until the day I die, chances are it will be lots of other things combined that will kill me or cause dementia. I have my little shopping list of supplements and I need to get sublingual vit b. I think certain supplements and eating well, and relearning enjoyment are the best I can do.
Posted by Beckett on January 20, 2012, at 11:51:41
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Beckett, posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 11:14:50
>Depending on a substance so completely,terrifies me.Yet,at night,when I take my k,it feels right,like its filling a hole that shouldnt be there.
My answer didn't address this, and I didn't want to breeze over it. Did you tell you pdoc this? Because it is important to share it. Not that that will provide an answer. Being less alone in terror helps I have found. Many people are afraid to be dependent on a medication, a person, a bank account. To be dependent literally means off of from something. I find it terrifying to be dependent, personally speaking. I don't have an answer yet other than to share.
Posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 13:58:58
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » gadchik, posted by Beckett on January 20, 2012, at 11:51:41
I should tell my pdoc everything that Im feeling about k.I see her every 6 months,next up,april.I dread saying anything negative for fear she will decide maybe I shouldnt be on k.My pcp didnt like the idea at all of me taking k everyday.They all think the ssris are the answer.I could probably have stayed on z and tapered k,however,Id be so huge.
Posted by Phillipa on January 20, 2012, at 20:39:48
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by gadchik on January 20, 2012, at 13:58:58
Just home from day trip ladies. I don't feel benzos fry your brains. Scott posted an excellent chart on the equivalencies of the benzos and tappering with valium as it's considered the mildest one. Benozs hit gaba and that is anxiety related as you both know. Klonopin is more mellow but stronger, xanax is just short acting with a bit of antidepressant feel. It's the SSRI's that are worse to taper off. And personally from what I read cause more damage than a benzo. Love to you both. Phillipa
Posted by gadchik on January 21, 2012, at 9:08:12
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by Phillipa on January 20, 2012, at 20:39:48
Thanks,phillipa.And the benzos have been used so much longer than the ssris.Havent they been around since the 50's? I know that I am on such a small dose and only once a day,I should be fine.Life is better(for me)with a benzo.I need to remember that.
Posted by gadchik on January 21, 2012, at 9:09:35
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by Phillipa on January 20, 2012, at 20:39:48
Tell me about your day trip? Its nice to get out and away from the usual routine day.
Posted by Beckett on January 21, 2012, at 10:11:32
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Phillipa, posted by gadchik on January 21, 2012, at 9:09:35
I think it is difficult to discontinue a medication because of fear. Phillipa knows how I have discussed getting off X. Ihess able o discontinue opiates, and that was tough. I was afraid of pain. But I drew my resolve, and I knew I would be better off, and so it must be done. I have never reached that resolve with benzos. I have never been entirely convinced I'd be o.k. So that is my fear. I have had umpteen meds come and go, but the X or K (mostly X, only K for two years) has remained. Low dose. I feel stuck. I was thinking that as long as I am deeply fearful, I will not have the resolve. So jeez, I am still not ready. Instead I think things like 'k is better than x'. Then I get restless and think about changing. No wonder I come across as such a kook to my shrink.
Posted by gadchik on January 22, 2012, at 16:48:45
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing?, posted by Beckett on January 21, 2012, at 10:11:32
Exactly.FEAR is the thing that is behind the wish to be or not to be drugged.You say you have tried both x and k.Since I never stayed on x longterm,what do you find is the similarities and differences in them? my pdoc wanted me to try x first i think cause it has some antidepressant activity.But she did say that k has mild mood stabilizer action.I still have some x,and occasionally I will let 1/2 of a .25mg dissolve under my tongue,if I awake at say 2am.It works,but tastes horrible.
Posted by Beckett on January 23, 2012, at 8:58:14
In reply to Re: New Year,but am I willing? » Beckett, posted by gadchik on January 22, 2012, at 16:48:45
gadchik, I suspect your pdoc is correct, that k is better for mood stability and x for panic. However, I am sensing that x creates a panic cycle. It's subtle, but even when the XR version wears off, the quality of my thoughts shift. I don't like that. I can observe it. I will discuss this with my doctor because I cannot afford to go up and down mood wise every day so artificially. Personally I feel x is more insidious because it has an antidepressant feel which is (to my mind) only a very temporary lift of mood that falls as the drug wears off with it's short half life.
This is the end of the thread.
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