Posted by hayhay6287 on June 17, 2009, at 3:22:55
I have been diagnosed as being bipolar, however I don't think the diagnosis is right since I have lied to every psychiatrist I have been to. I don't want to be locked up in a mental institution. I sometimes feel like people are out to get me, or like things aren't real. Sometimes I think that maybe I'm already dead and this is hell. I drive down the interstate and think about driving my car under a semi. I see movie type visions of me killing other people, usually bashing their skull in. I sometimes look at people or animal's eyes and think about cutting the pupils out. I have dreams about killing people sometimes. I'm sometimes in a daze and feel high even though I'm not. Some days I feel great and on top of the world and other days I'm angry, frustrated and sad. I get violent sometimes, punching walls or throwing furniture. I have racing thoughts and can't focus on one thing for long periods of time. I also have two way conversations with myself as if I'm talking to someone else. Does anyone know what's wrong with me? I know this behavior isn't normal, but I don't want to be locked up. I've never seriously hurt anyone, I've been in fights, but who hasn't.
poster:hayhay6287
thread:901463
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090604/msgs/901463.html