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Re: repeating old patterns? need advice! » crazy teresa

Posted by JenStar on January 12, 2006, at 10:11:14

In reply to Re: repeating old patterns? need advice!, posted by crazy teresa on January 11, 2006, at 19:43:32

thanks again to everyone for your support. I talked to my hubby (who always thinks she's pretty weird) and he thinks that if I come out and tell her to stay away, it might make her mad. He suggested doing the "slow withdrawal" thing -- making myself less and less accessible over time, until she gets tired of it and moves on to someone more available.

But the thing is, I've already DONE that. I never call her; I rarely pick up her calls; the only time I saw her was the other week when she did a drive-by and I thought it was UPS and I answered the door. So I ended up talking with her and going for a walk b/c I didn't want her to hang out in my house.

But I actually DID come out and tell her honestly that I completely disagree with her lawsuit, and I think it's hypocritical and wrong. She acted like she was going to cry. Then -- and this is weird -- it's like she TOTALLY FORGOT I SAID IT. She started chattering on again about it all, as if I'd never even expressed my disagreement. Almost like she blocked it out!

Then she started getting all clingy and asking if she gets divorced can she store lawyer papers at my house. I said NO. She started following me to my house. Then, thank god, she got a phone call from a friend. As quickly as she's latched onto me, she suddenly forgot me. In the middle of a sentence she answered the phone and started BABBLING to this other person. I hesitated a few moments, not sure what to do. "I'm going home, see you later," I told her. She barely even noticed. "OK" she told me, and her whole face brightened as she talked to this friend. (Good, I am glad she has one!)

She's so easily distractable. So it' makes it clear to me that she doesn't really need ME, or want ME. She just wants an AUDIENCE, someone to talk to. So...if I "abandon" her - she still has people!

Weird, though. And why do I see to collect people like this? Why can't I randomly meet friends that I want to hang out with? Is htere something wrong with me? (Probalby...maybe don't answer this!)

JenStar


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poster:JenStar thread:597349
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060108/msgs/598307.html