Posted by IsoM on January 17, 2003, at 18:56:34
In reply to Re: What's it mean to you to feel close to someone? » IsoM, posted by mikhail99 on January 17, 2003, at 16:10:07
I'd be the last person to add any discord to someone's marriage, but I do understand what you mean. I've been single for 6 years now & am far happier than I'd ever been with my husband. I stuck it out for 24 years. To him, his needs were paramount over mine & our sons. When we needed attention, he said he was too depressed to give. Never mind that I was struggling with depression too. I never even asked for much either.
I feel because I put my needs on the back burner, it only made him more complacent & figured the situation didn't have to change. It was only when a crisis point was reached & I demanded that we get some counselling & work on this together that he found the better solution was to leave.
Try to get your husband to accompany you to your pdoc or therapist so he can hear this from someone other than you. Hopefully, if he cares enough about you, he'll be willing to do his best to make some changes. You may even need to make some too to reinforce more loving behaviour. Any improvements, even small, should be encouraged. I hope something better works out for you.
poster:IsoM
thread:35372
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030111/msgs/35411.html