Posted by mist on January 29, 2002, at 16:59:50
In reply to Re: Changing from the past - how?, posted by Greg A. on January 29, 2002, at 14:03:54
Greg, I hope I will be able to get to the same point you are with my own "issues." It sounds like you're in control (by virtue of being aware and making choices) and not letting the patterns run your life. -mist
> Mist,
>
> It is really hard to change or break out of life long patterns. I agree to some extent that we seek out familiar things from our past, at a subconscious level; children of alcoholics marry alcoholics and so on. But on a more day to day level, I think you are on the right track. Insight may not make you feel any different but it does give you the chance to modify your behaviour and you reaction to people and events. Often, our first reaction sets the tone for how we proceed. If you understand why you feel a certain way, you can get yourself to respond in a different way. For example, my tendency with my oldest daughter is to be angry and critical of many of her actions. I can’t stop feeling this way, but I can control my response. Instead of yelling, I can walk away. Or I can ask if she would like to talk about it. The end result is much different than if I went with my feelings.
>
> Greg
poster:mist
thread:17475
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020125/msgs/17493.html