Posted by Greg A. on October 29, 2001, at 14:12:58
In reply to Re: Oh - Woman of few words . . . Julie? » Greg A., posted by Krazy Kat on October 29, 2001, at 10:07:33
K.,
Yes you may ask. When I feel anxious now, I feel anxious. I have found no solution. However, I do not crave a drink to any great degree. The drinking was not doing much for my anxiety anyways. In the evening, when I did most of my drinking, it would numb me, which was the feeling I sought. But the next day, the rebound anxiety would be quite bad. I was caught in that vicious circle: drink in the evening to kill the tension and suffer the next day from drinking, and therefore be ready to drink again that evening. Once out of the cycle, I am experiencing just what I expected. I am steadier. The lows and anxious times are still there, but not fueled by alcohol. I can’t say that I do not miss the temporary relief that came with evening drinking, but I can certainly do without the up and down swings. I think I mentioned once before that one of my goals in not drinking was to eliminate a variable in influences on how I felt while on meds. There seemed to be a contradiction in trying to fine tune meds to feel better, in getting exercise to feel better, in trying to change some of my behaviours and expectations of myself, to feel better, and then dousing it all in alcohol. So now I can say, “ on a day in day out basis, this is how I really am feeling’, without having to factor in alcohol intake.
I think I will be asking to change my meds at my next pdoc appointment. But I am looking forward to telling her that alcohol is not a consideration this time.
I don’t really have any tricks to avoid the temptation to drink. Whenever I had stopped for awhile in the past, I had to make sure there was no alcohol in the house. This time, there is beer in the fridge, and unopened wine in the rack. The first few days were the toughest. Now I feel I have something to lose if I give in. I promised some people, myself included that I would stop drinking and see what happened. I have made no commitment as to any length of time I will stop for. If I said a year, that would be like admitting defeat. If I said forever, that’s too much to think about. So I’m saying today.
Is there a responsible, right way to drink. Sure, for some people. A drink when it’s offered or whatever. But not the daily use of alcohol to ‘fix’ some problem. I do not remember ever having just one drink to make me feel better. It was always a number of drinks. If someone said I could have one drink a day but no more, in lieu of none, I would go with none.Greg
poster:Greg A.
thread:13027
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011025/msgs/13106.html