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Re: can you tell when your therapist

Posted by pegasus on September 10, 2010, at 9:07:23

In reply to can you tell when your therapist, posted by tetrix on September 8, 2010, at 20:02:59

I had a T once who used some techniques in a really transparent and fun way. One thing he would do is, if I claimed to not know what to talk about, and wanted him to pick something, he'd start talking about Thomas Jefferson. So, it became a kind of joke, but also he was making a point.

He also did this thing that I totally hated. He'd ask me what I thought about something, and then I'd honestly answer. When I was done, he'd give me *his* thoughts, which were clearly already fully formed independent of what I had to say. I'd always realize that he hadn't really wanted to hear what *I* thought, it was just a way to move the conversation to what *he* thought. I always felt duped, and really annoyed, by that.

Sometimes he'd repeat something he'd said before, too. Then I'd realize that it was something he probably said to a lot of people. A sort of canned response. Usually about something that must come up a lot in his work, such as running into him outside the office, or whether we could hug, or that type of thing. I hated that, too.

I'm sure most Ts use things they've learned, during our sessions. I don't know when it becomes "technique" versus just skillful therapy. I guess when it seems canned? Not genuine? For example, I've had Ts use obvious "therapy techniques" such as sitting forward, changing tone of voice, asking particular questions, etc. and it felt totally natural and good.

Peg

 

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poster:pegasus thread:961726
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100831/msgs/961914.html