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Re: My therapist is extraordinary sometimes » TherapyGirl

Posted by Dinah on May 30, 2010, at 21:31:11

In reply to Re: My therapist is extraordinary sometimes » Dinah, posted by TherapyGirl on May 29, 2010, at 20:25:19

Your therapist often reminds me of mine. :)

I embarrassed my family today by starting to cry in church. I sat there with tears rolling down my cheeks, and mucus running down my nose. (Thank heavens for the emergency kleenex I keep in my purse.)

I had been thinking about something I had said earlier. That she was like a comet streaking through my life, full of energy but too quickly gone. All of a sudden, my view of the situation changed. I realized that the only thing worse than losing her from my life would have been to never have had her in my life.

I remembered that my husband hadn't been too crazy about my getting her. But that I'd told him there was a hole in my life that I needed to fill. That I wasn't as happy as I could be.

I remembered that she didn't have an accident or get sick. This was something she was born with. She was destined to live a short life, no matter what.

I thought how lucky I was that she lived that short life providing me with something I needed desperately. I hoped that I had also provided her, in that short life, with what she needed.

I sort of came to from my reveries just as the minister was saying something about God not sending us more truth than we could tolerate. And that made me cry some more. Because if anyone would have told me even yesterday that I was lucky, I'd have snapped their heads off. Yet when I was ready, it was so clear how very lucky and privileged I was.

I hope that's not too mushy.

 

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