Posted by FindingMyDesire on February 26, 2009, at 22:22:36
I come to it when I'm really in need. I have little (really no) compassion for myself for having such a great need and instantly feel like how could I possibly matter to anyone, especially since I have nothing to offer that anyone would need. It's a very unsafe feeling. Gradually, over a certain amount of time (usually), I start to feel re-connected and then almost present and grounded; capable of loving others and feeling cared for in return (can't ever really be love, of course), but it's something and I actually take it in. For the moment.
Then I run away. Hm.
So, since I just cried through therapy and I won't see her for a week (we just cut back due to $) I just want to cut her off all together. So, I'm trying this post. Starting my cycle, I suppose.
poster:FindingMyDesire
thread:882716
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/882716.html