Posted by lucie lu on September 9, 2008, at 13:38:11
In reply to First appointment with new T....or not, posted by no_rose_garden on September 8, 2008, at 21:38:06
Hi NRG -
It sounds to me as if there are a couple of separate issues here. There is the question of whether, given the inauspicious start, you should give this guy another try. (All T's do screw up, but it is tough when it's the first meeting!)
But in your post, you seem really pretty ambivalent about seeing *anyone* right now. I am trying to picture myself in your place. (1) If I were really in pain and needed desperately to see someone, I would definitely gve this guy another chance because, hey, well I got his attention already, right?(2) If I just needed or wanted to find a new T to continue things I was working on, then I might or might not go back to this guy. Guess it would depend upon what I'd heard about him, my gut feeling about the match, and my sense that he, like Avis, would probably try harder. (3) But if I was not even sure whether I needed or wanted therapy or a new T, then I think I would use this as an excuse to back off. Maybe I would tell the T honestly that I decided to take a breather, some time off from therapy, and that I would probably check in with him when I felt ready.
Parenthetically, I did something like that last bit with my current T after seeing him only a few months. (This was more than 5 yrs ago, before I was fully committed to him or the therapy.) I told him in Sept that I'd be back after Jan 1, when I had insurance again. And I actually did that. He was happy I called. He told me (later) that he figured it would be 50:50 that I would be back, and he was glad that it was the "yes" 50...
So I guess my question to you is, why are you looking for a new T and why do you, or don't you, think you want therapy right now?
Best, Lucie
poster:lucie lu
thread:851100
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/851183.html