Posted by Dinah on July 11, 2008, at 20:08:47
In reply to Confusion with understanding feelings, posted by Annierose on July 11, 2008, at 16:25:37
I doubt there are many things that don't provoke ambivalent feelings in me. I tend to get lost in shades of grey, all tangled up and paralyzed.
Recently I've tried to change my thinking in a way that I stumbled upon and that has been helpful for me. Instead of using "but" in my statements of ambivalent feelings, I am trying to substitute "and".
My therapist cares very much about me *and* he is extremely forgetful in ways that hurt me.
My mother is wonderful with little children *and* she's very difficult with everyone else.
I am conscientious in many ways and try to do what is right *and* I am not infrequently self indulgent and lazy.
That movie was very funny and exciting *and* it was about twenty minutes too long.
I'm not sure if this is to the point for you. It has proved helpful for me, although I couldn't really tell you why that little change has been so helpful.
poster:Dinah
thread:839291
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080709/msgs/839335.html