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Re: Getting closer to the heart of the issues? » ClearSkies

Posted by antigua3 on September 26, 2007, at 19:47:49

In reply to Getting closer to the heart of the issues?, posted by ClearSkies on September 26, 2007, at 13:30:58

<<What I'm angry with about myself now, is that I think with so much time past and with the events long gone cold, that if I'm feeling victimized, that it's something I'm doing to myself now that is perpetuating that feeling....But I'm acting, and reacting, like I'm still a victim. So I really AM a Loser since I'm being a victim and I'm not even being abused any more"

So does that make me a loser too, since my abuse occurred in my childhood and I'm not over it yet? That I'm still working on it every single day in some way?

You know the answer is no. You aren't a loser, and things still trigger you, despite the much better life you have now. There's no way you couldn't be triggered--in some ways you should feel proud that you are safe and healthy enough now that you can deal with these issues. You couldn't before, I couldn't before, and we just can't be so hard on ourselves.

I'm not a loser, you aren't either. Also, I'm not a victim, and I will never say that I am a survivor (don't know why that last one bothers me so much).

We are who we are, trying to do the best we can. Look at how far you've come, and look forward to knowing that all of your hard work has paid off in many ways--maybe not yet in all the ways you want, but please give yourself a huge amount of credit; I certainly can see that you deserve it.
antigua

 

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