Posted by DAisym on June 1, 2007, at 0:26:32
In reply to Re: Please help me explain this to my T » jammerlich, posted by muffled on May 31, 2007, at 23:21:14
It seems to me that you are in one of those hard places where examples provide a way for the other person to focus on the minor details and not on the message. I'd stop trying to PROVE that you have a right to feel like you feel and instead focus on clearly saying what you feel.
You feel misunderstood.
You feel hurt from the way things ended before.
You don't trust that things won't suddenly end again.It is quite possible that you are projecting onto her some of your fears about people not being who you think they are. You have very good reasons to do this - both from her previous behavior AND the core issue that has you upside down right now. Someone very close to you turned out to be very different from what they appeared to be. Someone you loved and trusted. So your therapist "gets to" bear the brunt to those left over feelings. It is her job to let you transfer some of those feelings to her and then help you work through them.
Sometimes you have to keep repeating yourself in short sentences. And sometimes you just need to make of list of questions without attempting to know the answers. Questions I hear in your post are: Will you get tired of me if I come too much? How will I know if we are edging back to that place of termination? Are you aware that last time I had no idea it was at that level? Can you see how hurt I am? Do you really think you can help me?
Will I ever stop hurting?
I'm sorry Jammer -- I wish it wasn't so hard for you. Certainly you have enough to deal with -- I just think that all the crud in your life might be really coming into your therapy now, and that makes it hard but it also makes it possible to work through it.
poster:DAisym
thread:760595
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070525/msgs/760709.html