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Re: can professionals keep this a secret? » ElaineM

Posted by B2chica on June 16, 2006, at 11:16:10

In reply to can professionals keep this a secret?, posted by ElaineM on June 16, 2006, at 9:41:38

first of all....wow.
you are going through something very distressing. i'm very very glad you've decided to talk about it here. thank you.

>>I know he cares, and I know he is not trying to hurt me at all. Not at all. I'm just really scared that if I disappoint him in any way that he can terminate me.

and that is why we call this sexual harrassment. any person in authority who uses anytype of sexual inuendo or personal closeness in a working relationship is crossing a line (even if it is accepted) because of the position of that person.

sweetie, of course you like the attention. who wouldn't. it feels good for people to care about us. but unfortunately it doesn't sound like this guy Does care about you in a good way. if he did. he would keep better boundries. or in this case...some boundries as it sounds as if you are both the patient and the therapist at times.

>>>Is how we are actually bad when we haven't kissed or slept together yet?

...and here's the red flag... 1)yes it is bad. this kind of situation can be damaging to any person 2)"yet"...i'm' concerned with what you have said that quite frankly you may feel pressured to let him touch you even if you are really wanting it. i don't mean to sound crass or uncaring but i'm scared for you and when i read that a big flashing sign of sexual assault flashed before my eyes. unfortunately if this guy is the way i think he is, it won't stop. it will only get worse. it needs to be stopped, the question here is how is the best way.

hopefully others will be more helpful with the how.

i can only suggest two ways. one, that you DO tell your doctor. now from what i understand if you were to report any type of abuse to a psychologist or doctor they are require by law to report it. and i think i would see what's going on with you abuse. now i'm not in your shoes, so i don't know exactly what's going on. but i am VERY concerned from what you have said. maybe if you tell your doc the two of you can figure out the best way to deal with this 'T' (and i use the term loosely).
the other suggestion is to tell him how you are feeling...all of it. but quite frankly i think he'd just be worried about covering his own butt, so i don't know what his reaction would be. and i don't know that that is the best answer here.
Either way (((Elaine))) you need to stop seeing this T immediately.

i think that this person will continue to act the way he is if you don't stop. and i actually think that unless he is repremanded he will infact do this again to someone else (if he isn't already).

this is a very serious situation and shouldn't be taken lightly. please. for your sake i strongly suggest telling your pdoc.

hopefully others here will give you some better insight.
but know i care and please let us know how you are feeling about all this.

(((((((hugs))))))))
b2c.


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poster:B2chica thread:657557
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/657590.html