Posted by annierose on May 31, 2006, at 6:55:14
In reply to Is it always more important to talk about it?, posted by All Done on May 31, 2006, at 1:03:47
I'm conflicted. I too think I want to know more about my T, about her real life, her family, etc. But then I think back to the possibility of actually running into her on vacation last Easter, with her family, and how anxious that made me feel, actually sick to my stomach, and I realized there must be a reason it's best we do not know about them.
Now I did ask my T if she ever thinks about me outside her office. And she said, "Yes". I should have followed up, "In what context?", but I didn't. She said, "I'm a human being. I couldn't do this job if I didn't care about my clients." A year ago she began a session, "I just saw a (this movie) and I thought of you. Have you seen it?" I didn't but I went out to see it.
When I read your post, I wished after you asked, "Have you ever had a dream about me?", you let the question hang there. I've been asking more questions and I just let them sit in the room for awhile. It's hard and can be uncomfortble. Sometimes she surprises me with wonderful, thoughtful answers. And it's in those answers that I hear how much she does care about me.
I think it's human nature to want to know about someone that we love so deeply. Our T's are so important to us, we care about their feelings, and we want them to like us back. We are interested in knowing them too.
Talking therapy. The most complex, difficult, loving, rewarding relationship.
poster:annierose
thread:650795
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060526/msgs/650854.html