Posted by littleone on October 5, 2005, at 0:16:31
In reply to conscious reality shifting?Help?!, posted by muffled on October 4, 2005, at 23:30:02
In Nov 04 I told my dad that I wasn't celebrating Christmas that year. What I didn't tell him was that I was taking steps to cut him out of my life while I worked on therapy.
Since then, I have not contacted him once, I've just run into him a couple of times at unavoidable family get togethers.
However, what had really upset me was that he had never contacted me. I took that as meaning that he didn't care about me or that he was too wrapped up in himself to notice I was missing, or a heap of other negative things. The whole thing really hurt me a lot.
One day my T said that perhaps due to my dad's own issues, he couldn't decide on a course of action (eg confront me, talk to me, cut me off, whatever) and therefore did nothing in indecision.
I scoffed at this until I could see that I was actually doing the exactly the same thing with a girl I knew (I didn't know what to do about her, so I did nothing) and this insight threw a whole new light on it all.
I guess I'm still a bit upset that my dad isn't mature enough to have tackled his own issues and address problems with his children, but seeing it all in the new light has eased my hurt quite a bit.
This example was obviously centred around my dad and my self worth, but the same sort of effect can occur with insights you gain in any part of your life.
That's all conscious reality shifting is - an insight. Suddenly you can see something in a different way and it changes the way you feel and think about it.
poster:littleone
thread:563050
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051001/msgs/563063.html