Posted by Tamar on May 19, 2005, at 17:14:37
In reply to How to stop constant fear, worry and rumination?, posted by pinkeye on May 19, 2005, at 14:13:37
Gosh, it sounds as if you’re having a horrible time with all the worrying.
I sometimes go through similar worrying about everything, and often it’s because I’m so worried about one thing that I worry about everything else as well.
I wonder if part of the problem is that you don’t have a solution to the problem of whether or not you will return to India. So because you don’t have an answer yet, you worry about all kinds of other things that might be simpler to solve.
I was struck by your comment in another post that you were already in the US before you married your husband. I’d always imagined that you’d married him in India and come together to the US, with the plan to return. But somehow the fact that you were already here sheds a different light on it. You were already making your own life, and then when you got married your range of choices was restricted.
So I’m wondering why you agreed to return to India after marriage, when you’d previously decided to make your life in the US. Was it just to please your husband?
It sounds to me as if finding a solution to the question of whether to return to India would provide you with relief from all of your other worrying. Of course, that’s the hardest thing to decide, and maybe it’s hard to focus on that all the time, since it’s such a huge problem.
Have you talked to your parents about the question of returning to India? What does your dad say about it, since he was the person who encouraged you to go to the US? Or do you feel that part of the reason you don't want to return to India is the proximity to your parents?
Sorry I don’t have any answers for you... but here are some hugs.
(((((pinkeye)))))
poster:Tamar
thread:499933
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050513/msgs/500020.html