Posted by Dinah on May 21, 2003, at 18:45:03
My therapist is moving. Not out of town thank heavens, but right to the heart of downtown. Now I avoid downtown like the plague. All those shiny buildings, all those shiny people. The rotten traffic patterns, the horrendous parking. It magnifies my existing agoraphobic tendencies.
He's really been supportive about the move. He says that regardless of how his practice develops, he values having *me* as a client. He's said that he will do whatever he can to make this work. He'll schedule me for the more quiet times of the day. If it absolutely won't work out, he'll try to work out an office sharing arrangement with a colleague. I really do appreciate all of that. And I really really appreciate that at least he isn't moving out of town or closing his practice. I couldn't deal with that.
But I feel like a kid whose parents are moving somewhere terribly unpleasant. It really doesn't matter how I feel about it, I've got to do what they say. And then they (he) tells me that I need to look at it in a more positive way. Worst of all, he says that I do have choices (meaning that I could quit seeing him). He knows that I can't do that, and it seems disingenuous of him to pretend otherwise. And he might be able to make me go downtown to see him, but he can't make me like it. I feel like that little kid whose parents are moving, and I am acting like one. I wonder if holding my breath till I turn purple, or hiding under the house when the moving van comes would help. :)
I know I'm being petty and childish and stupid. But I really hate downtown. It'll also add a fair amount of time and expense to the time and expense seeing him already costs. And I already have to just accept his out of town (with no backup whatsoever now) trips on his other job. I just feel so darn impotent!!!
poster:Dinah
thread:228166
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20030407/msgs/228166.html