Posted by TomV on October 7, 2004, at 15:47:25
In reply to Never allowed to grieve, posted by carriejane on October 7, 2004, at 12:02:09
It's kind of funny. There are a lot of parallels in our lives. My differences are that I did experiment with drugs, but because they tended to make my depersonalization disorder worse I pushed them away. I also didn't have a terrible childhood; it was very confusing at times and painful because of the anxiety disorders I developed, but for the most part I flourished, in spite of it all. But my adulthood is a different matter. Like you, I searched for my parent for a while, all along knowing it was impossible to bring him back. In the end, it's become a painful search for myself. Losing one's "self" is about the most confusing journey one can undertake.
I also had grief counseling. I too feel weird because it was so long ago, and my sisters and my wife and some friends can't understand what I'm going through. I don't feel complete either, knowing things would have turned out very different if he had lived.
Please take care.
Tom
poster:TomV
thread:399960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20040811/msgs/400060.html