Posted by Racer on July 20, 2006, at 17:10:59
I know I do this a lot -- I absorb the criticism, and reject the compliments. Today, I did that again, but I was aware of it -- if not right that minute, at least soon afterwards. Why? If I take the criticism as being accurate, and either fall into despair or try to make sure that particular criticism never gets aimed at me again, WHY don't I accept the compliments, too?
Even if I manage the one thing I'm trying to learn, and say, "Thank you," without going on to show why I don't deserve it ("this blouse I made? You like it? Thank you. You know, there's a problem here with the collar, and if you look over here, the buttonholes are crooked..."), I still reject it internally: "She's saying I'm a good student because she wants to give some positive feedback or because she doesn't know what I'm really like..."
Today, my teacher told me I was good at what we were doing. Now, I think I kinda am good at it, so that should simply have corroborated my own self image in that area, right? But I still found myself rejecting it internally!
Please, could someone knock me on the head? I think something's come loose in there...
And it's not that I decided I wasn't good at this *because* she said it -- because I still believed she was right! Talk about tangled logic...
What happens to the rest of you when something like this comes up?
poster:Racer
thread:668687
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20060706/msgs/668687.html