Posted by Chris O on March 30, 2005, at 20:10:32
In reply to Re: Saliva cortisol test » Chris O, posted by Sarah T. on March 30, 2005, at 1:17:40
Sarah:
Hey, I really appreciate the feedback. Thanks. I don't know where I'm going to go next in terms of treating my GAD, panic, obsessive worrying and depression. I probably should be on a med...I'm starting to go down a really bad road again--staying up all night, obsessively worrying about going to hell, worrying about my health, thinking about the end of the world, and anything else that threatens my security. I really feel like crap today; I haven't slept much the last two nights. I'm supposed to see the psychiatrist I've been seeing since last year tomorrow. He gave me Cymbalta to try out last month, but I haven't taken it yet. I wanted to lose some of my SSRI weight, but that is not really happening either. It's all so...lovely.
Yeah, I probably should try to find a different HMO doctor, as you said. It's just that...I am a fr*gging hypochondriac so...it's hard to balance for me, the whole doctor a-hole factor versus my hypochondria. On the one hand, I'm grateful when doctors reassure me nothing is "wrong" with me; on the other hand, I wish they were more empathic and could help more. I don't know. I've been to the doctor, like, so many times for no reason. Just for worry. I can see how they get annoyed by me.
But there is something "wrong" with my chemicals, I know it, it's beyond my control. I took some 5-HTP this morning and while it was not perfect, I immediately felt calmer, a sense of relaxation in my body and a better ability to focus. Not pefect, but okay. I wish there something I could take that would just heal me. I've been trying to pray a lot over the past couple of years, but in many ways that has increased my anxiety (the whole awesomeness of God, you know? I already feel way out of control.)Anyway, it sounds like you're feeling crappy too, so I wish you the best. I'm sure we'll cross paths again at Dr. Bob's as we continue to do battle with this wonderful darn disease.
Sincerely,
Chris
poster:Chris O
thread:472304
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/alter/20050323/msgs/477889.html