Posted by seldomseen on February 22, 2009, at 9:32:51
In reply to a new beginning..., posted by twinleaf on February 21, 2009, at 15:46:43
***I hope, too, that we can carve out a space here to discuss this matter openly. I think you bring up some key points that will certainly get the discussion going. I respect your courage (in so many areas). These are simply my thoughts on the points you brought up.***
"His reasons were that, as the civility guidelines are now set up, the administrators wield inordinate social and emotional power over the community of posters. He likened this situation to a dysfunctional family, in which "parents" can tell "children", that, even though someone has hurt or mistreated them, they will be the sole ones punished for saying so."
***Though I often refer to babble as a family, I do not see the administrators as parents and I do not see myself as a child. To me, using the illustration of posters as children eliminates the element of choice. Children usually have no choice in the way they may behave, express themselves or respond. However, I think as adult posters we certainly do have that choice.***
"The person who has caused the hurt and pain either suffers no consequences, or a relatively mild one, such as a PBC. An insulting comment about oneself moves into the Archives, readily available to anyone who wants to find it, while our silent and unknown protests go unheard and unresponded to in the notification process, like a stone thrown silently into a bottomless well."
***I don't know exactly how I feel about the notification system either. I know it's intent was to (1) relieve the burden of posters feeling as though they had to respond to something hurtful (2) help the deputies monitor the boards and (3) let us have some say in what we think is outside of the civility rules. I don't know if that system is working or not.****
"Posters who get blocked are hurt by the process, even though we know the deputies are only carrying out their responsibilities, and do not have any wish to hurt us. It's inherent in the process- Happy TC got hurt, and I did too. One's sense of community, trust and emotional freedom, in relation to Babble, is permanently diminished when you start getting blocked. I know I will never again feel the security and freedom to share so many intimate things, and to just have fun- the way I once did."
***I agree, there does seem to be something inherently hurtful in the whole blocking process. What I think, and have always thought, is that the escalation of block length is especially of little merit. If the blocks were truly designed to be a cooling off period and not punitive, then why the escalation? In any case, I can personally offer no alternative to blocks, as repeated violations of the civility rules, I think, have the potential to threaten other posters freedom and sense of safety on the board. So I guess the question comes down to balancing the individual's level of freedom versus the community's sense of safety. As I said, I can offer no other alternative.*****
"On a related topic, Dr. Bob points out that the Psychology Board is not psychotherapy. I respectfully disagree. Posters there are continuously offering support and encouragement to help others deal with the hardest issues in therapy, and from time to time, they offer very sophisticated and helpful interpretations (not to mention fascinating dream interpretations!)."
***I post a lot on the psychology board and have received a tremendous amount of insight from the posters there. I will maintain, however, that board is not and should never be considered psychotherapy. The posters (including me), as much I respect and love them all, are not trained professionals, and although this rarely happens, there is a potential for much harm if one views that board as psychotherapy. Speaking solely for myself, as much as I try to neutralize my own self in replying to a post, I have not had the training to do so. I'm sure, that I unwittingly bring my own issues to the floor and am in no way the blank slate that trained professionals can provide in a truly therpeutic setting.***
"Whether we would like it to be so or not, transference issues are in play here. By implication, hurt, misunderstanding and rejection are intensified also. I believe this is an additional reason for Dr. Bob and the deputies to have a very thoughtful discussion about the effects of the administration guidelines upon the emotional well-being of participating posters."
*** I'm afraid I have to go back to the notion that I think this board is not designed to manage, handle or accomodate those kids of issues as it is, in and of itself, not a therapeutic frame. On the other hand, I think one could argue that the civility rules could be as they are specifically to minimize those kinds of hurtful interactions among posters. The question I think is how do achieve balance between the needs of the community as a whole, and the individual poster?****
Seldom
poster:seldomseen
thread:881542
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20081228/msgs/881651.html