Posted by 10derHeart on April 11, 2005, at 23:30:35
In reply to Re: Dr. Hsiung: Please deal with this » 10derHeart, posted by used2b on April 11, 2005, at 22:35:44
> I don't understand how describing a joke as awful makes it any less awful to tell. When are casual, light-hearted references to partially disrobed children in the context of a molestation trial not potentially offensive, vulgar or obscene?
For me, particularly because it was coming from Mark H., I made an immediate distinction between him mentioning he heard such a joke (and indicating he didn't like it,) and him "telling" the joke. I admit it's a distinction I wouldn't make, every time, for every person, in every circumstance. For example, Lou makes a good point in his post about my post, in bringing up various other types of "off color" jokes. Lou makes me pause and think about what I said, and where the lines would be drawn. And so do you, BTW.
I guess for ME, there is some grey area. I'd hope there would be times where I could feel free to relate to a friend (and they to me), ANY kind of joke I'd heard, so I could let them know the joke existed, and that it disgusted me, or offended me, or shocked me, or whatever. Telling the words of a joke, in that context, isn't the same - to ME - as just *telling* the joke to get a reaction or laugh. If that friend wanted to call me on it, as being hypocritical, maybe that's a good thing. I'd have to really examine my motivation and need to mention the joke, and hopefully I'd learn something.
As I said, it may have been unwise for Mark H. to even post such a thing here. I concede that absolutely. I'm just saying, considering all I've observed about the poster, as well as the context of the thread and the rest of his post, I didn't have the same reaction you did. I didn't mean this as a "free pass" for everyone on Babble to post any sort of joke as long as they said it was "awful" first. It's usually going to be more complicated than that, I think.
>>I'm making a good faith effort right now. We'll see how far it gets me.Well, FWIW, I don't find you uncivil right now.
> > Unfortunate.
>
> I feel something not so nice when you say my decision to ask someone not to post to me is "unfortunate".I'm sorry you felt that way. Nothing "not so nice" was intended. You have every right to ask anyone not to post to you. I think you may have misunderstood, which is my fault for poor construction in my writing. I was trying to express that I really like seeing two posters work things out. And that it's sort of sad (to ME) when that can't happen - for any reason.
poster:10derHeart
thread:483036
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20050323/msgs/483133.html