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Re: I have mixed feelings as well » Dinah

Posted by leeran on April 23, 2003, at 1:55:09

In reply to Re: I have mixed feelings, posted by Dinah on April 22, 2003, at 21:09:35

Musing as well.

What I love about the internet is what I dislike about the internet - the anonymity. Ten years ago most of us didn't have the opportunity to interact with people from all over the world who share similar interests (or who are dealing with similar issues/problems). I have met some great people who, in turn, have become great friends on the internet (including my husband).

Some have crossed the line between "message board and real life" by stopping in to visit when they’re in this area. So far, I've been really, really lucky (note, I'm talking about seven people, including my husband, not a cast of thousands).

The funny thing is, I am very distrustful by nature, so the fact that I have ever extended myself beyond the safety of a message board has been a real leap of faith (times seven).

The anonymity of the internet can be a drawback, but think of how many times a day we are anonymous. Standing behind people in line at the store, riding an elevator with people you may never see again. Passing through a new town can leave me feeling really anonymous, and nothing is more anonymous (and agonizing) for me than a bar. I guess we run risks wherever we spend much time. Maybe it's an odds thing. Example, I’m home most of the day and I see that I could very well develop agoraphobia without the Wellbutrin.

I actually put two and two together the next day after I responded to the “post in question.” When I replied, I wanted to help. ASAP. I’m very moved by the written word, regardless of whether or not it's grammatically correct. If I perceive pain, I react. It's definitely part of my "fixer" mentality.

I was always very afraid that my mother would commit suicide and in retrospect, I guess I thought that if I talked long and hard enough I could prevent it from happening.

I never thought about it this way 'til I wrote this paragraph, so I guess I can walk away from it feeling like I gained some insight (actually, I'm just rationalizing losing fifteen minutes of my time on a Saturday night :-)

My musings started out with a much greater purpose. Then the Ambien started to kick in.


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