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Re: exclusion and separation (and please be civil)

Posted by Dr. Bob on April 28, 2002, at 9:16:28

In reply to Bekka...Are you serious about this post? -Phil, posted by Bekka H. on April 27, 2002, at 14:25:19

> I think the idea of exclusionary boards is great. Let's have as many factions as possible. Now that Dr. Bob has endorsed the concept of "The Other," we know which ones we should hate.

I guess hating is a form of bonding, but isn't it possible to come together in a more positive way?

> Next thing you know, the "Old Timers" board members will feel so special, superior and power-hungry, their own exclusionary board won't be enough for them. They'll want to take over all of PB, and no one new will be allowed.
>
> Bekka H.

That's your fear? That you're going to end up completely excluded? Abandoned?

--------

> Do we love them, or do we hate them?
> Are they here for us, or gone?
> Did they even say goodbye?
>
> What time will they be back?
> Never? Thanks, but now I'd like a better answer.
>
> Who gave you the right to touch my lifein this way?
> I didn't do anything wrong (did I?)
>
> I just want things to stay the same.
>
> I love you so much, our love makes me feel
> I. .. Am. .. Never. . . Separate.
>
> If you really loved me, you wouldn't do this.
> If you were a Good Other, this would not be happening.
> If you were Mentally Healthy, this would all be moot.

I think they're here for you, but would also like some time to themselves -- maybe partly because they also want things to stay the same (the way they were for them). It's not that you did anything wrong. Try not to take this personally.

Loving but being separate can be hard.

> Besides, PB2000 is fucked. As a concept.
>
> Zo

Maybe, but please be civil and don't use language that might offend others.

--------

> Phil, I must say, you are one of the last people on this board who should be complaining about "mean" posts. Perhaps you should look up "projection" in a psychiatric dictionary.

Please be civil and don't post anything that others could take as accusatory.

> My point is that the creation of SEGREGATED, EXCLUSIONARY boards, and the endorsement of them by Dr. Bob, is precisely the sort of behavior that leads to problems like hate and wars... Psychobabble is NOT an affluent country club. And it is NOT a college or university with reunions. I thought it was a MENTAL *HEALTH* community, but apparently I was wrong.

Why is it OK for country clubs and college reunions, but not mental health communities, to be exclusionary?

> Shortly after I joined PB, I recall responding to some of Mark H.'s queries on the PB medication board. He was quite grateful to me for the help I was able to offer him. Now imagine if only he and other "old-timers" had been allowed to post on that board. Chances are, I wouldn't have even bothered reading his questions, but even if I had, I wouldn't have been able to respond/post.

If someone wants as much input as possible, they won't post only to an exclusionary board. And even if they do, others can still respond -- as long as they redirect their replies.

> I think I have been quite helpful and supportive to many members over the few months that I have been a member here.

Try not to take it personally. This isn't happening because you haven't been supportive.

> I do think I have a lot to offer
>
> Bekka H.

But shouldn't people have the option of choosing whom to ask for support? People are free to come here, for example, instead of turning to those in their "real" lives. Isn't that excluding them? Do they have nothing to offer?

--------

I haven't checked this out systematically, but aren't there more people from 2001 asking to have the 2000 board opened up than vice versa? Why would that be?

Bob


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